Three Old School Friends

McMouse | 08:35 Thu 01st Jul 2010 | ChatterBank

3 Answers

Rachel, Clare and Samantha haven't seen each other since boarding school.

They rediscover each other via a reunion website and arrange to meet for lunch in a wine bar.

Rachel arrives first, wearing camel Versace. She orders a bottle of chilled chablis.

Clare arrives shortly afterwards, in grey Chanel. After the required ritualised kisses she joins Rachel in a glass of chablis.

Finally Sam walks in, wearing a faded old Barbour anorak, blue jeans and Wellington boots. She too shares the wine.

Rachel explains that after leaving school and graduating from Monash in Economics she met and married Timothy, with whom she has a beautiful daughter. Timothy is a partner in one of Melbourne’s leading law firms. They live in a 10-bedroom house in Toorak where Susanna, the daughter attends drama school. They have a second home overlooking the beach at Portsea.

Clare graduated from Ormond College and became a Consultant Gynecologist. Her husband Clive is a leading A&E Consultant. They live in Brighton and have a second home in France.

Sam explains that she left school at 17 and ran off with her boyfriend Ben. They operate a birdpark in Healesville and grow their own vegetables. Ben can stand four parrots side by side on his penis.

Half way through the third bottle of chablis.............some hours later. Rachel blurts out that her husband isn't Timothy, he's Tom and he's a valuer at Stonnington Council. They live in a terraced house in Carlton and keep a caravan in Blairgowrie.

Clare, chastened and encouraged by her old friend's honesty, explains that she and Clive are actually nurses at The Alfred. They live in a flat in Prahran and once had a timeshare in Lorne.

Sam ponders all this for a moment before uttering that the fourth parrot actually has to stand on one leg.