That's The Spirit

[marval]

A ghost floats into a bar.
The barman says, "Who ordered a spirit?"

I always test psychics with a knock knock joke.
If they say "Who's there?" I get up and leave.

Sky News: 'Paranormal activity sweeps America'
If I was a ghost, I'd do something more scary than just tidy houses.

I don't think I’ve ever been as miserable as when I got stuck in a lift with two ghosts the other day,
But when it started moving, it really lifted the spirits.

Our neighbour's house is getting repossessed.
It's such a shame, I never got to meet their first ghosts

A ghost just floated past me and it was perfectly horizontal.
I think it was a spirit level.

I tried to hold a séance last night. After two hours, all I'd managed to do was talk to three window cleaners.
That's the last time I muck around with a squeegee board.

I was recently noticing strange happenings in the home, I'd wake up and furniture had moved, lights were on, and many other different strange things.

My mate referred me to an exorcist, now, I didn't believe in the idea he could do anything but, I was willing to try anything.

To my surprise, he was completely successful, and I’ve had nothing strange happen, however.

A bill came through the door for £2,500. I had no chance of paying this!

I rang the exorcist up to try and sort something out, but nothing could be done so, he is coming down tomorrow to repossess the house.