Very angry, yet again, with MIL

[numnum]

I've been on here a lot with all my recent problems.

Me and my partner have split up and are working on things. He's been staying at his Mums and had the kids over for the night once in the 2 months.

He wanted them again a few weeks ago and his mum said no. We were quite annoyed as we'd given her notice and she wasn't going to be there till late at night when they'd be in bed and was going out in the morning so would have only seen them in the passing. She has a big house so them all being there wouldn't be a big issue with beds etc

Then again, he wanted them to stay with him tonight. We asked at the beginning of the week and again they wouldn't be going there till after their tea then he'd be dealing with them.

But she said no as she had her other grandaughter over tomorrow morning. Fair enough, a bit annoyed as my ex would be dealing with our kids and they'd have all been able to play in the morning for an hour or so before coming home

Then he came over tonight and said that her other grandaughter is staying at her house tonight which has really upset me.

Whats upset me even more is I just need a break its been a very tough 6 months with everything thats happened, and the thought of having a night and morning to myself was just brilliant. I've got no one else where we stay to babysit so I'm with my kids 24 hours a day and I just wanted silence for a few hours. His mum knows I have no one else and its not like we were asking her to babysit, he just wants to see his kids

I cant believe how she can say no to our kids then get her other grandkids over

[numnum]

she's trying to phone but cant even answer the phone i'm that upset

[bednobs]

well, her house, her rules i suppose. can't he stay over at yours and you go out?

[numnum]

i know, im just that glad my little one is just at that age where she wont understand that granny has said no to her yet got her little cousin over for the night instead. in 6 monhts or so she will understand and that wont be nice

the last time we'd told her she was staying at dads then his mum said no and had to tell her she wasn't going because granny was ill then she got upset because granny was 'ill'. learnt our lesson their telling her

theres no where to go where we live and i've no family here. we're right out in the country

[woofgang]

would your partner come and sleep over at your sand you go out? (I think that's what Bednobs meant)

[numnum]

just found out she took two grandkids, one thats a baby aswell overnight. i really don't know what her problem is with us

my kids are overly but she says they behave when they are with her. so it cant be because there hard work.

[Kassee]

Why can't he take them out for the day instead of using his mum's house at all. You would get your break then and have the whole day free to yourself, they could come back just in time for bed, and he would have the children to himself all day. Take them out somewhere nice and dont involve his mum at all - its her loss.

[welshlibranr]

I think she's just being spiteful for whatever reason!......it's her loss, her grandchildren from you won't have a bond with her!.......silly woman!.......

[Nini74]

how many kids have you got? sounds unfair, but maybe she's thinking that if she makes things too easy for you both, then you'll take longer to sort things out? i don't know....

you haven't answered the other suggestions about your ex having the kids either for a full day or at your house? seems he has a brother or sister nearby as their children stay with "gran" - do they have room for your ex and the kids one night? x

[joko]

shes trying to punish you for splitting with her darling son...perhaps wanting to show you what life will be like without him and make you realise what you have lost...realise how much you need him...

however...could this all actually be your husbands doing?...blaming her but actually his choice...for the same reasons...

[cathfromsaron]

sounds like she doesn't want to help and these feelings run deeper than it might seem! don't let her win!

i would go to a friend's and leave your ex in your house, with strict time boundaries!

cath x