Postman has just been and I've got four cards I presume they're mothers day cards, I won't open them til Sunday. What puzzles me is - I've only got three children..... I know its April Fools day...
> >As we get older we sometimes begin to doubt our ability to "make a difference" in the world. It is at these times that our hopes are boosted by the remarkable achievements of other...
I thought of you this morning. There's a new prog on in the morning at 9.15 - 10am, hosted by Michael Aspel.called 'A Hundred Years of Us' its on for 5 days today being the first. It traces the Census...
The £2.99 Special We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the 'oap's special' was two eggs, bacon, sausages and toast for £2.99. 'Sounds good,' my wife said. 'But I don't want the...
I never really liked the terminology "Old Farts" but this makes me feel better about it. And if you ain't one, I bet ya you know one! Old Farts are easy to spot at sporting events; during...
A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, 'Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, But they only know to say one thing' 'What do they say?' the priest asked. They say, 'Hi, we're...
In a couple of posts I asked for the score of the England v Wales Game. but no-one came back with them. I can see why really one didn't want to be a spoiler. But my posts have disappeared completely,...
Can we hope we've come to the end of 'The Census' questions now. It became a pain in the neck. It seemed all straight forward to me I couldn't see why there was so much hoo-hah. Even the forms had...
This bloke goes to a brothel and says to the Madam, "I want to get screwed." The Madam tells him to go up to room 12 and knock on the door. The bloke walks up to the door, knocks on it, and...
When I went to lunch today, I noticed an old lady sitting on a park bench sobbing her eyes out. I stopped and asked her what was wrong. She said, “I have a 22 year old husband at home. He makes...
When her husband finally died, his wife put the usual death notice in the paper, but added that he died of gonorrhea. No sooner were the papers delivered when a friend of the family phoned and...
A couple just got married and on the night of their honeymoon before passionate love, the wife tells the husband, "Please be gentile, I'm still a virgin." The husband being shocked, replied,...
June Brown better known as 'Dot Branning' has signed a new contract which will keep her in the soap (EE) for another year. The 84 year old will reportedly earn £300.000, a salary bettered only...
eHarmony... Dear Sir, Sorry Your application to join our match making service has been rejected. You failed question no/14 - -"WHAT DO YOU MOST LIKE IN A WOMAN" "My Dick" - Was not...
I was walking down the street when I was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless woman who asked me for a couple of quid for a meal. I took out my purse, got out a ten pound note...
This morning when I got up I walked into the conservatory and the sun was streaming through it was beautiful but Oh Dear! there was an awful smell of cats pee, ( not our cat) evidently it had pee'd up...
> > > > >Friendship ~ None of that Sissy Stuff > >Are you tired of those sissy 'friendship' poems that always sound good, but never actually come close to reality? >Well, here...
Forwarded Message After a visit to the *** house, a man notices green lumps on his willy, so he goes to the doctors. “That’s serious” says the doctor. “You know how wrestlers...
