I bumped into my old friend Eric the other day, a champion dart player. He said, "Why did you put super glue on my dart?" I replied, "You just can't let it go can you?".........
My wife came home from shopping with 4 crates of beer, 3 cases of wine, 1 litre of vodka, 2 litres of gin, a litre of whiskey and 2 loves of bread. I said, "Why so much bread?".......
Paddy says to Mick, "Jeez, I'm ready for me holiday, but this year I'm going to do it a bit different. Three years ago I went to Spain and Mary got pregnant. Two years ago I went to Italy and Mary got...
A guy goes to the doctor: “Please help me doc. I have this horrible blinking in my right eye that I just can’t control.” Doctor: “Ah come on, it’s not so bad as you think.” Guy: “Oh, you...