Donate SIGN UP

Patsy33

1281 to 1300 of 1972

First Previous 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 Next Last

Avatar Image
Patsy33

Help With 60Th Birthday Gift.

Myself and husband have been invited to a cousin's husband's 60th Birthday do. He is into flying, training to be pilot of small plane. Any ideas as what to get him?? Between £20-£30.....
20:48 Wed 29th Mar 201713 answers, last by Cloverjo 13:36 Thu 30th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Donor

This bloke gets a bone marrow transplant from a donor in Argentina and the operation was a great success. So he wrote him a thank you letter which began – “Dear Diego, Marrow Donor...”...
17:13 Wed 29th Mar 20172 answers, last by Arksided 18:51 Thu 30th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Pizza Delivery

When I rang up for a 747 pizza, the guy on the other end didn't seem to know what I was on about. I said, "You know, a large plain please"......
12:38 Wed 29th Mar 20171 answer, last by Shaglene 14:14 Wed 29th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

New Film..

Just watched a new film called 'The Ruler' It didn't measure up to much.......
11:32 Tue 28th Mar 20176 answers, last by jno 17:15 Tue 28th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Clem Curtis

Just seen Clem Curtis from the Foundations has died today. Always loved song Build me up Buttercup and a few more. RIP Curtis, great singer.
19:02 Mon 27th Mar 20174 answers, last by Patsy33 19:31 Mon 27th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Suit

Just bought a suit made from a cactus. I look really sharp..
14:48 Mon 27th Mar 20175 answers, last by AB Editor 14:08 Tue 28th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Good In Bed...

I'm actually pretty good in bed. I don't fall out so much now....
13:08 Mon 27th Mar 201717 answers, last by Bazile 19:23 Mon 27th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Two Mice..

Two mice chewing on a film roll. One says to the other, "I think the book was better"......
16:53 Sun 26th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Shoplifters

I was delivering a speech to Saudi Arabian shoplifters in which I denounced how Saudi Arabia punishes its shoplifters. They seemed moved by it, but the applause was very quiet....
16:55 Sat 25th Mar 20172 answers, last by Patsy33 17:26 Sat 25th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Middle Of The Road.

I was weaving dangerously in the middle of the road when it occurred to me that I should find a better place to make a wicker basket....
19:15 Fri 24th Mar 20174 answers, last by Samjenko 14:44 Sat 25th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

A Suspect..

A suspect was charged with killing a man with sandpaper, in defence he said, " I only meant to rough him up a bit"....
22:00 Thu 23rd Mar 201711 answers, last by Patsy33 10:12 Sat 25th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Overdrawn.

I'm really overdrawn at the bank and they keep phoning me and leaving voicemails. I wish they'd just leave me a loan....
20:18 Thu 23rd Mar 20174 answers, last by weecalf 16:52 Fri 24th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Taxi Driver

I used to be a taxi driver but had to give it up. I couldn't stand people talking behind my back..
13:38 Wed 22nd Mar 20173 answers, last by Fanriffic 19:43 Thu 23rd Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

My Doctor..

My doctor has just told me I'm paranoid. I wonder who else he's told?.......
11:46 Wed 22nd Mar 20175 answers, last by percy1946 17:00 Wed 22nd Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Downloaded

I've just downloaded a copy of the Bible from the internet. When I'd finished it said, 'Saved'....
22:49 Tue 21st Mar 20176 answers, last by Baldric 20:39 Thu 23rd Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Police Are After...

Police are after the 'knitting needle nutter' who's stabbed 6 people. They believe he's following some kind of pattern.
23:10 Mon 20th Mar 201710 answers, last by marval 18:13 Tue 21st Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Toys R Us

I was in Toys R Use today when I noticed a long queue. I asked a member of staff what was going on. She said, "Oh, that's the Barbie queue". So like an idiot, I waited over an hour to get a bleedin...
18:25 Mon 20th Mar 20172 answers, last by DTCwordfan 20:32 Mon 20th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Sandwich

Paddy finds a sandwich with two wires sticking out of it. He phones the Police and says, 'Bejaysus i've just found a sandwich dat looks like a bomb' Is it ticking, the operator asks No i tink it's...
19:39 Sun 19th Mar 20179 answers, last by vulcan42 10:00 Mon 20th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

I Really Wish..

I really wish I knew who kicked the jack out from under the car that I was working on. The suspension is killing me..
18:02 Sat 18th Mar 201723 answers, last by Tilly2 21:05 Sat 18th Mar 2017
Avatar Image
Patsy33

Lansoprazole

Just wondered if any of you are taking this for acid reflux/ Hiatus hernia? I used to take Omeprazole but they stopped working. I've been taking it for about 5 weeks. I've been so tired, no energy...
17:23 Sat 18th Mar 201710 answers, last by Patsy33 20:29 Sat 18th Mar 2017

1281 to 1300 of 1972

First Previous 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 Next Last