You've Got To Laugh Haven't You?
News3 mins ago
I went to McDonalds today, it was tipping down with rain.
He said what can I get you?
I said a Big Mac please. ___ Paddy goes into a John Lewis department store and asks the shopkeeper, "Excuse me... ...
He said what can I get you?
I said a Big Mac please. ___ Paddy goes into a John Lewis department store and asks the shopkeeper, "Excuse me... ...
Nobody laughed. It turns out I'm not even remotely funny.
While browsing my local bookshop, I came across a book called How to Solve 50% of Your Problems. So I bought two.
The owner of the tailor's shop kept hovering over me while I was browsing, so I asked him to leave me alone. He said, "Fine, suit yourself."
Yesterday was National Awareness Day....
I didn't know that. ___ I found a Load of Zips and Buttons Dumped on my front lawn this morning..
Someone's been Fly Tipping. ___ Two blokes trapped in a cave,... ...
I didn't know that. ___ I found a Load of Zips and Buttons Dumped on my front lawn this morning..
Someone's been Fly Tipping. ___ Two blokes trapped in a cave,... ...
It was the Gold Medal Wrestling Match between the Irishman and American. The Irish wrestlers corner man told his wrestler that the American had never lost a match and was famous for his Pretzel... ...
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A policeman in full riot gear and taking on the protestors in Plymouth's Guildhall Square suddenly throws his shield down and starts running and running as if he was in a blind panic. Up the... ...
ज़िंदगी के खास दिन को मनाएं heartfelt birthday wishes के साथ! खोजें वो बेहतरीन शब्द जो किसी के जन्मदिन को और भी खास बना दें! ✨ चाहे वो रोमांटिक अंदाज़ में birthday wishes in hindi... ...
ज़िंदगी के खास दिन को मनाएं heartfelt birthday wishes के साथ! खोजें वो बेहतरीन शब्द जो किसी के जन्मदिन को और भी खास बना दें! ✨ चाहे वो रोमांटिक अंदाज़ में birthday wishes in hindi... ...
Dressage commentator: "This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother."
Paul Hamm, Gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and... ...
Paul Hamm, Gymnast: "I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and... ...
My mate said to me: "Do you like wearing that hi vis jacket all the time?"
I said: "I wouldn’t be seen without it !!" ___ If my name was David and I had a boy, I would have to name him Harley.
That... ...
I said: "I wouldn’t be seen without it !!" ___ If my name was David and I had a boy, I would have to name him Harley.
That... ...
Portly pensioner Pete was shocked when he saw the state of his latest bank balance, and demanded to his long-suffering wife. "What the heck have you been doing with all that grocery money I gave... ...
I applied for a personal loan and they asked what its for.
I said "It's personal." ___ The instructions for the chicken goujons said "Turn halfway through cooking".
Now I'm facing away from the oven... ...
I said "It's personal." ___ The instructions for the chicken goujons said "Turn halfway through cooking".
Now I'm facing away from the oven... ...
And He told me he has a job working volunteer in the local park clearing rubbish. The boss handed him a litter stick and a bag and said "no experience needed, just pick it up as you go... ...
The vicar was preaching to his congregation… "I've got sad news, he said. The treasurer, Mr. Greenhill. has absconded with the church funds,so the church is now bankrupt.… before I make an appeal... ...
Rodney says to Trigger," I'm off to America tomorrow ",Trigger Says, "Delawere"? Rodneys says,"I haven't told him Yet." ___ Did you know that farmers who talk to there cows get more milk so it’s in... ...
2007 Vauxhall Corsa with wide bore exhaust for sale, complete with roof mounted England Flags. £800 ONO. Can be purchased without the flags for £1000
Four old retired guys are walking down a street in London. They turn a corner and see a sign that says, "Old Timers Bar - All drinks 10p." They look at each other and then go in, thinking, this is... ...
When I was a about 10 years old my Mum said to me " Why don't you grow up Stupid"
So I did. ___ I asked a carpet fitter to do a runner for me.
I paid him up front and that's the last I saw of him. ___ I... ...
So I did. ___ I asked a carpet fitter to do a runner for me.
I paid him up front and that's the last I saw of him. ___ I... ...
