Bring Out Your Dead

[nailit]

Inspired in part by Mikeys post below (although something ive long thought),
does anyone else here find it a bit morbid how we see the need to trail our dead loved ones through the streets in a hearse to their graves (or crem)? the last funeral I attended was a few weeks ago but the last funeral that I was in a cortege in was my fathers, 17 yrs ago. I remember at the time been in the car following the hearse and thinking that it was all a bit morbid, parading through the streets with a dead body.
Maybe its just me but it reminds me of my thread title!

[murraymints]

not really nailit..I was never so proud of my dad when 200 + turned up in the chapel and the roads had folks standing showing respect as we walked to the cemetery where even more were waiting..... it was tremendously comforting and I was so grateful for folk who made the effort

[mikey4444]

Nailit....I have no problem with corteges.......but I have every problem with such young children being paraded through the streets, to satisfy a hard-hearted and hopelessly out of date privileged family.

[Barmaid]

Probably, but its tradition. I remember when my MIL died the funeral directors "drew" the coffin by walking in front of it to the end of the road, then jumped in the car until the crem where he once again got out. I thought it showed immense respect to the dead.

If I am walking along the street and a funeral cortege passes me, I will stand and bow. Just the way I was brought up I suppose.

[DTCwordfan]

A man was leaving a convenience store in Sneem with his morning coffee when he noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery.

A black hearse was followed by a second black hearse about fifty feet behind the first one. Behind the second hearse was a solitary man walking a dog on a leash. Behind him, a short distance back, were about 150 men walking single file.

The man couldn't stand the curiosity.

He respectfully approached the man walking the dog and said: "I am so sorry for your loss, this may be a bad time to disturb you, but I've never seen a funeral like this. Whose funeral is it?" "My wife's." ''What happened to her?"

"She yelled at me and my dog attacked and killed her.

"He inquired further, "But who is in the second hearse?"

The man answered, "My mother-in-law. She was trying to help my wife when the dog turned on her."

A very poignant and touching moment of brotherhood and silence passed between the two men.

"Can I borrow the dog?"

The man replied, "Get in line."

[murraymints]

with Mikey..I may not have been so prepared for it as a child... no I WOULD NOT have done it as a child mourning my daddy

[nailit]

Maybe its just me then :-(
Got no problem with funerals per se and its always a comfort to see so many people at a funeral. But why the need to parade a dead corpse through the streets. In my mind, grief should be for those attending the funeral, not flaunted through the streets for all to see. I'm not taking away the views of others by any means, just my own personal view. Personally, I hate the thought of my corpse been paraded anywhere. (maybe because I'm a bit shy :-) )

[ummmm]

How else are you going to get them to the church/crem?

Most people want a funeral to say their final goodbyes.

When my granddad died in my teens we had a funeral mass (Catholic) and then had his body flown back to Ireland. It took 6 hours to follow the hearse from Dublin to Tipperary.

[nailit]

LOL DTC...

[Islay]

Its quite common to see children walking behind the coffin etc here.

[ummmm]

The corpse isn't paraded. It's a closed coffin. Only the people who know the deceased know who's in the coffin.

You can't expect funeral cars to zoom round the streets with a dead body. They drive slowly not just out of respect but the fact the family are usually following.

[murraymints]

it is a mile twixt chapel and cemetery here Nailit...no choice..but at the same time it gave the villagers who knew dad, but not sufficiently to attend in a formal manner, to come out and say goodbye....it was very touching to see all the doffed hats and self blessing....especially the buses and common traffic that stopped in complete ignorance

[nailit]

//How else are you going to get them to the church/crem? //
Quietly and without fanfare ummmm. As I said its just my personal view.

[tamborine]

Agree, funerals are becoming a circus. I'll be in a body bag, direct to the crem for my last smoke ;)

[Barmaid]

But in communities, Nailit, people show respect. I know at MIL's funeral, the street paid their respects and they couldnt necessarily have travelled to the Crematorium (mainly being v old). And how else are they get to their place of rest? A black van?

[woofgang]

I wouldn’t do it and don’t like it. My loss and my grief is a private thing and I don’t feel it needs public display.

[murraymints]

Barmaid..I always stop , turn to the cortege and bow head 'till it has passed...

[Barmaid]

Sorry, others answered before me.

Funerals are for the living, not the dead. If you want to go quietly in the back of a van, fine. But others find solace and comfort in a ceremony, whether religious or humanist.

I deal with death every day of my life. The funeral is an absolutely key point in the grieving process.

[nailit]

// And how else are they get to their place of rest? A black van? //
Whats wrong with a black van dropping the deceased at their place of rest before the funeral?

[gness]

Nailit....you're not parading the dead body through the streets though, are you?

You are taking them to be buried or cremated with respect.......
It's not morbid....it's what has to be done and to do it with a bit of ceremony, unless the deceased requests otherwise, is natural and can be a good ending to life.......x

[ummmm]

It's not a fanfare, imo.

When you see a hearse and cars following it people pull over on the roads knowing there's probably grieving people on their way to the funeral of a loved one.

You have to remember as well that often these things come as a funeral package.