The Top Five Regrets.....

[boxtops]

This is a little sobering for this time of the morning, but gives considerable food for thought. Would you agree with this nurse's experience of her patients' deathbed regrets?

Personally, although things didn't go very well during some patches of my life, I don't have these sort of regrets at the moment.... however I do wish I'd known what we now know, to have been able to have seen some family things differently, but that wasn't within my gift at those times.

http://earthweareone.com/nurse-reveals-the-top-5-regrets-people-make-on-their-deathbed/

[237SJ]

Those prove what they say - that you don`t regret the things you did, you regret the things you didn`t do.

[andy-hughes]

Life is our experiences, it made us what we are, so if we were to change those experiences, then our lives would take entirely different paths, and we would not be the people we are now. So my regrets -

I wish I had left home at seventeen. I wish I had asked out every girl I was attracted to. i wish I hadn't smacked my children when they were naughty. I wish I had started music writing earlier. I wish I had proposed to my wife properly, instead of us sort of agreeing to get married.

So, with the exception of the last one - every other regret fulfilled would have changed my life completely, so although i idly think of those regrets now and again, I would not wish them to be changed because I would not be be, and I am very very happy being me.

[ummmm]

I have no regrets.

1. My family have never made me feel that I should be any different to what I am.

2. I don't :-)

3. I have no problem expressing my feelings...

4. Still in touch with my friends..

5. I'm very happy. I'm very lucky.

[bednobs]

personally i think that that article is made up

[andy-hughes]

ummmm - in our different ways we have arrived at a place in life where we are happy, and I know you appreciate that like i do, because so many other people don't get to that stage, ever.

[ummmm]

It's luck, Andy.

And I'm happy I'm lucky.

It's like your stance on being patriotic. It's the luck of birth.

[jno]

this was around a couple of years ago; she's written a book about it

http://www.guardianbookshop.co.uk/BerteShopWeb/viewProduct.do?ISBN=9781848509993&;guni=Article:in%20body%20link

[Sqad]

I cannot see the point of .."regrets."

One is faced with a decision and it turns out to be the right decision or the wrong one. If it is the wrong one, then why have regrets, you made that decision in good faith, so get on with life without....regrets......which are useless.

There may well be things in the past that in retrospect i wish i had done differently perhaps.......but ...regrets.....NO.

[1ozzy]

I was hoping to find at least things to add to my "bucket list".
Alas ;-(

[andy-hughes]

Sqad - "I cannot see the point of .."regrets." "

A fair viewpoint - but some people have regrets, which are as you confirm essentially pointless - because regrets are part of the human condition for some people, they have them, unwanted and pointless, or not.

We are all different and amen to that.

[1ozzy]

^^ please insert 5, where applicable^^^

[sandyRoe]

I've had a few, but then again, too few to mention.
Putting others before myself was probably the fault that will cause me most regrets when I'm near to croaking.

[Retrochic]

When we have 'regrets' at not doing something, or doing something, we tend to create a lovely scenario around what would have happened had we done or not done that. Point is we will never know what may have happened. We may be in a lot worse situation now had we done it or not done it.

[andy-hughes]

Absolutely Retrochic.

Our minds like to conduct scenarios based on what we imagine would be different if we had done or not done something, but the outcome could have been utterly different.

Check out The Monkey's Paw as a good example.

[Sqad]

andy......fair enough.

Good point by Retrochic.

[Robinia]

I'd go along with 1, 3 and 5 although I'm a bit better at expressing my feelings nowadays.

A good friend once said to me my only problem was my lack of confidence... and he was right.
However, looking back I see what has happened so far, good or bad, happened at the right time.

[joggerjayne]

I can understand 5.

If you're too happy too often, everyone thinks you are either (a) irresponsible, or (b) retarded.

Lighten up. Enjoy life. Enjoy every day. Make the most of it. Love people, even the ones of whom you disapprove. Enjoy diversity. Enjoy, frankly, everything.

[Greedyfly]

The happier one applies to me but the others do not. I am about as honest as I think I person can be usually, I am a firm believer of say it how it is.

Friends - if they are no longer in my life then there must have been a reason.

I am true to myself.

I do work hard but I enjoy it so why wouldn't I?

I don't plan to die any time soon but if I do my only real regret would be the happiness part I think. I spent far to much of my life being sad.

[boxtops]

I like all your responses, please share BAs..... although this bit of sqad's probably rings the most true for me

"There may well be things in the past that in retrospect i wish i had done differently perhaps.......but ...regrets.....NO"

Life's too short to spend it what-iffing.... the what-ifs might well not have worked out how we expected, anyway. What I've done so far has brought me to where I am today, and it's a good place, all in.

[Old_Geezer]

The thing with goals and regrets and that sort of thing is that what you achieve doesn't give a high for long and seems of little import, yet the things you wish you had achieved are viewed through 'rose tinted glasses' and seem so important.

I wish I was more capable than I am. Particularly in social situations. And I've never been a genius which is also a regret. But I try not to stress out about the things I can not change as I'm permanently stressed out anyway. Which is another regret, I wish I could succeed in not being stressed out by everything, but it seems that is simply not me. At least not the older me anyway. And the growing lack of enthusiasm for everything.

Oh and I wish I knew what it was all about and what, if anything, I was supposed to do with my existence. Probably nothing specific anyway, truth be known.