Dementia Ad

[jennyjoan]

What do you think of it - I think it very sad and very true - we are all caught up in our lives and we just need to give it just one more second to think about it. It has made me think more particularly as I currently have 3 friends with it and to be honest I can't seem to handle it very well.

When they repeat and repeat I just don't know what to say. Do find if I am in company of 3 people it seems to be easier. x

[DTCwordfan]

you answer each time, patience is the essence here......

[Elina]

I've not seen the ad Jenny. But yes, as Dt said, answer as if whatever's said is the first time you've heard it,until you've had enough.

[jennyjoan]

I know DT you are coming through with your mother and I imagine it so hard. I will up the ante with one of them. The other two have got two husbands who help them but this one is on her own. Don't get me wrong DT - she was the most repetitive person in the world before she took this so you may guess how difficult it is now. I also am aware very much that that can take any one of us at any one time and not even know it. It is so very sad.

[DTCwordfan]

as you may query down the line and as to my novel on the books, "Am I going mad?"

[jennyjoan]

Lina - that's it - when do you have had enough if a person is there with you maybe for 6 hours ALSO she wants to have a drink - I have vehemently said no way - she couldn't cope as she has epilepsy too.

[Elina]

In all honesty Jenny, I couldn't do 6 hours!

[DTCwordfan]

seriously, patience is very much the order of the day - and it ain't easy. There are times that reality checks are needed and that is the art, when to say 'No Enough' - as in, 'Your parents would be 116 and 112...,' for example.

[jennyjoan]

It can help if there are other company

[jennyjoan]

Am laughing at you DT - don't understand 116 and 112

[Elina]

The point is Jenny, they don't store 6 hours conversation, so you're there for as long as is practical for you, that's all you can do.

[jennyjoan]

that's correct they don't store one hour's conversation never mind 6 - this particularly lady.

[Elina]

Exactly, keep that in mind. You stay as long as you would with any other friend x

[jennyjoan]

what I am finding tho - she is being deserted - she does have two other sisters, one son (he lives with her but works and when he comes home - he lives upstairs!!) - nieces and nephews - never come near her - her only daughter lives in America and she hasn't been much carp on the phone either. God.

[mazie]

DT is saying Conne that his Mum thinks her Mum and Dad are still alive. They would be 112 and 116 if they were. But to Dementia sufferers they think they still are around. My Mum was the same. Bless her, she was always asking me when her Mam was coming to see her. It's hard especially when it's one of your family.

[Elina]

But you can't be there for everyone Jenny. You're doing your bit, don't go down the guilt road. Think about this, every one of your visits are forgotten about. Live in the 'moment' with them, there's the quality time, while they are enjoying your companionship.

[mazie]

Elina is spot on Conne "Live in the 'moment' with them"

[jennyjoan]

thank you Lina but I am guilty of not visiting not as often as I should but will try and mend my ways a little bit -

We did have a laugh with her last week (now NOT laughing at her) - her name is K - and we have known her as that all her life - now she is telling us she was christened and she was adamant she was christened C. We were choking. God love her - what a disease.

[Elina]

It's a very cruel disease Jenny. You have your own life to lead too, visit when you have the time.

[DTCwordfan]

mazie is spot on....as to my mater, "I'm a spinster - and always have been." A few seconds later, "In fact, I'm a virgin."

My sister and I looked at each other and exploded in laughter. I had the pleasure of calling the other two, the youngest who can be, shall we say, 'a little black and white,' and saying, "Did you know that you were born a bastardd (liberty there as to Ed's words)?"

More seriously, you are laughing at the condition and not the person.

[Cloverjo]

I don't know the ad, but it's very sad and could happen to anyone.
I understand how difficult it is with the repeating. Maybe it would help if you leave the room for a minute when she gets stuck in an endless cycle of the same questions. She might have forgotten what she was saying when you come back in, and at least start on something else.

It's easier if there are more people around.