News1 min ago
Bloke's operation
This bloke's on the operating table, having a operation on his tackle. The surgeon cuts open the scrotum and takes out the man's balls, placing them on a table. As the surgeon walks away to get a piece of equipment, the balls drop off the table onto the floor. Without noticing this, the surgeon steps back and squashes them under his foot.
His assistant says " What are we going to do now? We can't sew him up without his testicles. "
" I know, lets put 2 ball bearings in their place " says the surgeon.
" No, they will be too heavy ".
" Let's put 2 ping-pong balls in then. "
" No, when he has a bath, they will float and he will notice ".
" I know, lets put 2 pickled onions in then ".
The assistant goes to the canteen and comes back with a jar of pickled onions.
After selecting 2 suitable sized spherical objects, the patient is sewn up. After he comes round the bloke is told to go home, get plenty of rest and come back in as month's time.
A month later the bloke goes back to the surgeon. " How are things? " asks the surgeon.
" Fine " says the bloke, " everything's healed up nicely ".
" The only thing is, when I'm walking down the street and a bit of skirt comes towards me, I get no reaction.
But when I see a cheese sandwich, I don't half get a hard-on!! "
With thanks to Jimmy Jones.
His assistant says " What are we going to do now? We can't sew him up without his testicles. "
" I know, lets put 2 ball bearings in their place " says the surgeon.
" No, they will be too heavy ".
" Let's put 2 ping-pong balls in then. "
" No, when he has a bath, they will float and he will notice ".
" I know, lets put 2 pickled onions in then ".
The assistant goes to the canteen and comes back with a jar of pickled onions.
After selecting 2 suitable sized spherical objects, the patient is sewn up. After he comes round the bloke is told to go home, get plenty of rest and come back in as month's time.
A month later the bloke goes back to the surgeon. " How are things? " asks the surgeon.
" Fine " says the bloke, " everything's healed up nicely ".
" The only thing is, when I'm walking down the street and a bit of skirt comes towards me, I get no reaction.
But when I see a cheese sandwich, I don't half get a hard-on!! "
With thanks to Jimmy Jones.
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