New cat!

[Kim69]

My Mum & Dad ahave just adoped a three year old cat, he is absolutely beautiful, quiet but very timid.We're not sure if he's been hit or abused in anyway as he is very timid when there are loud noises or sudden movements. My Mum loves animals but can't seem to warm to him, although she has just lost her Dad so this may add to the effect. Does anyone have any tips on how to bring them closer and to help this moggy become more confident. I realise that it will just take time probably but they are thinking that they can't cope with him, but I just know he will turn out to be a beautiful cat with a bit of perseverance.....Thanks alot.

[bensmum]

You didn't say how long your Mum has had the cat but it sounds as if it's not that long. Your Mum is probably feeling quite lost and sad after her loss so perhaps if you could try to explain that the poor little cat probably feels much the same she may understand a little better. Unfortunately it is usually a matter of time and patience and she just needs to let the cat find its own way and one day I'm sure she will find that it's been worthwhile. If she is really adamant that she cannot cope with the cat though it would probably be better to try to re-home it before it gets too settled. Good luck - I do hope she decides to keep the cat and that they have a long and happy relationship.

[pussnboots]

bensmum is right, it will take time as long as your mum feeds the cat and no one else. Cats tend to have cupboard love and get to know where their next meal is coming from, and she should just keep talking to it, give it a stroke without being too fussy and it wont be long before the cat will cotton on.

[TIGGERLIT]

to help things along you can try feliway plug ins, which you can get from your vet or get them off ebay as they are cheaper. they are destressers and they do work as i use them all the time, they calm cats down. i have a few cats cos i breed and 2 dont get on. all the time the plug ins are on they dont fight but as soon as it runs out they start.
type in feli way plug ins on google and it will tell you all about them.

[kayefitz]

Unfotunately it does need time and patience-if you can lie on the floor and be at the same level and gently try and play with the cat using a small ball of foil or a piece of string-leave a line of treats then leave the room for a few hours and see if they have been eaten-dont attempt to try and stroke it or pick it up just wait for the cat to come to you-I am a pet sitter and find alot of our clients have cats that are timid but normally after a week you should see a slight change in the cat-it needs to trust you and know that you will do no harm.

[annavc]

When I got my cat (also a rescue) I read somewhere about cat body language and one of the things it suggested was to make eye contact with the cat then slowly close your eyes, keep them closed for a moment then slowly open them - basically a slow motion blink. Keep doing this while maintaining eye contact with the cat and it will tell the cat that you are not a threat to them. You should find that after a while the cat will start to mirror you and will also close his eyes. This is a really good sign and means the cat is starting to trust you.

I know it sounds a bit weird but I did it with my cat a few times a day for a few days and he quickly started to mirror me and after a couple of days he'd decided I was friend rather than foe and took up residence on my shoulder! He's been there ever since!! I was very skeptical about it but it really did seem to work. We still do it now but sometimes he initiates it - I'll find him staring at me and as soon as I look at him he does a slow blink!

Good luck.

[wiggal]

annavc!
I dont think that is weird in the slightest, i do that with my cats, but i never stare at them directly, as in trying to stare them out, as that is never a good thing to do!
My Sammy Lee does it alot with me, she sits and looks at me and then blinks at me, which i always do back!

[bexe]

hi,
i got a rescue cat which turned up at my work (a kennels) one day and didnt leave, fink sum1 abused her and dumped her at gates coz she was in bad way. we all named her 'spit' for the obvious reasons and cudnt get near to her. every spare min i got id go and sit near her with my hand out, talking gently but not making eye contact (threatening for cats) and eventually, she came to me for the odd stroke. in the end, i ended up taking her home as she got cat flu and needed round the clock care.
keep the new cat in one room which is quiet and not too big. i did this, and it allowed her to get used to the new enviironment, and i gradually increased the area she was allowed into. a year on, shes great with me, but still extremly nervous of my dad and not so much my mam and isnt at all bothered by the dog!!
time and patience is the key, and soon enough theyll come around. am now building her an enclosed are ain the garden to get her used to noises outside before letting her out on her own.
hope some of this helps. oh, and try pilchards in tomato sauce to get cats to eat, they love it!!