School
The kindergarten class had settled down to its colouring books.
Willie came up to the teacher's desk and said, "Miss Francis, I ain't got no crayons.”
"Willie," Miss Francis said, "you mean, "I don't have any crayons.' You don't have any crayons. We don't have any crayons. They don't have any crayons. Do you see what I'm getting at?"
"Not really," Willie said, "What happened to all the crayons?"
A group of young children were sitting in a circle with their teacher. She was going around in turn asking them all questions.
"Davy, what noise does a cow make?"
"It goes moo, Miss."
"Alice, what noise does a cat make?"
"It goes meow, miss."
"Jamie, what sound does a lamb make?"
"It goes baaa, miss."
"Jennifer, what sound does a mouse make?"
"Err.., it goes.. Click!"
The day care teacher holds up a picture and asks, "What's this?"
"A horsey," one child answers.
"And this?" the teacher asks.
"A piggy," replies another youngster.
"And now this one?" asks the teacher, holding up a picture of a male deer with a beautiful rack of antlers.
There was no answer, only total silence.
"Come now, children," she coaxes, "I'll give you a little hint. What does your Mummy call your Daddy when he hugs and kisses her a lot?"
"I know! I know!!" exclaims one little girl. "It's a horny bastard!"