I know this sounds stupid but hear me out. In the U.K. when we want a cat's attention we say something like "pssst, pssst, pssst" and make hand gesture like we have a treat for it. When I went to Tokyo last summer there was like 7 cats chilling in the park, I pull out the old pssst pssst trick and I don't even get an ear twitch, I was like a foot away from the cats and I tried everything, I tried Chii chii chii, nyan nyan nyan and even neko neko neko (Christ I sound like a blithering idiot writing this). I asked the friends I met over there but I don't think they understood me and they laughed when I told them about pssst pssst. This has been bugging me for 13 month now, please help, there has GOT to be a difference in the language!
Little Johnny told his mum, "I found a cat this morning, but it was dead".
"But how did you know it was dead?" she asked him.
"Because I píssed in its ear", said Johnny.
"You did WHAT !?"
"You know, I leaned over and went, "Pssst" right in it's ear, and it didn't move."
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