Name Dropper!
My wife is threatening to leave me because of my constant celebrity name dropping. David Beckham told me this would happen.
As we approached the airport, the pilot started banking. "What a time to choose to change occupations," i thought.
I once asked my dad, "Where were you when you heard Kennedy had been shot?" He said, HE'S BEEN SHOT?"
Whoever came up with naming baby birds really missed a trick by not calling a baby pigeon a smidgeon.
If Elvis was alive today, he'd probably be dead by now.
Me singing; "Hush little baby, go to sleep." Cop; "No, I said do you have an alibi?"