Should I contact him or not? Part One

[Daisybabe]

Long story short: knew a guy from when I was 13 in SA, he was 10 years older, grew up in same community and were good friends. As an older teenager, we kissed on and off for about 4 years before I moved to Europe. He had issues with our age difference, feeling guilt. Over years, we stayed in touch and saw each other as friends when I was on hols. My father died in a car crash, I went home and we met up again. This time was different, I was 26 and 'grown up'. We got back together and he was a massive comfort-it was also on a different level this time-it just felt like the most natural right thing in the world to be together as a couple. One exception: he felt that I never spoke about what I was really thinking, particuarly about him and my dad's death right then (it had only just happended remember!)

I came back to the UK (he said I would be ruining my career etc if I stayed in SA) and I felt him pulling away. He just put up shutters, next I hear that he is dating someone else. I was going home for Christmas a month later so emailed saying 'hear you're dating someone, fine, but hope that doesn't mean we can't hang out as friends when I'm home'. He text saying 'he can't see me, goodbye.' I finally gave in to all my emotions, wrote him a long letter telling exactly what I was thinking - mostly about my fathers death actually - but also that I thought he was amazing, etc but a coward for not wanting to try. He responded 'never want to see you again, goodbye.'

Of course, 5 days later when I flew home, I bumped into him on my first night. He completely ignored me, but wouldn't leave the bar, just got angrier and angrier and ended up picking a fight with all his (my) friends. Was a very nasty night all in all.