I've never had a penguin fall on me but i had an unpleasant experience at the zoo watching penguins being fed...the keeper lobbed a disgustingly well dead fish which flew by the penguins and walloped me right on the arm. Slimy and gross. Boy was i popular in the car on the way home!
Really, though, what CAN you do? Sue the council? Soo the Panda? Lenny the Lion? How do you Lenny the Lion anyway? Well, you go to Glasgow Zoo (hiring department) and ask the Head Keeper if you can get a loan of the lion, which translated into Glaswegian is: 'Haw mate! Can ah get a lenny the lion?' :o)