Good Morning Early Birds

[LadyCG]

Good morning. Friday at last - and many of us will break up today. I'm hoping they'll release us early :-)

I still have a couple of things to wrap and food to prep. I can't wait to see my parents and give them their gifts.

I hope everyone has a nice relaxing time planned and they're all organised. Does anyone have anything particularly exciting going on today?

Thinking of Emmie and others who are absent and wishing them well. Peace and good will to all.

[Xeronema]

Morning :)

[LadyCG]

Morning, Xeronema. How are you?

I just had a coughing fit which led to me being sick. I wasn't expecting that :-(

[Xeronema]

That sucks, I hope that the coughing fit and sickness has finally passed. I'm ok I guess - I've just replied to a thread that I hit close to home. I really didn't want to be awake this early, I've got a lot of stuff I need to do today, so that I can get ready for Christmas.

My OH's dad rang at 22:00 last night, and did a great job at upsetting her yet again. I'm not sure why my OH bothers with him any more. I don't think she knows why she bothers with him any more. Each year we get invited over for 'Christmas' dinner. It used to be on Boxing Day and then a couple of years ago we were push even further away, and now it's the day after Boxing Day - we matter that little to him. Last year was absolute hell because he refused to allow my OH's wheelchair in the house as it had been outside and would drag muck in. Then we had the problem of getting her upstairs to the toilet. She was in so much pain I had to give her morphine and diazepam. I just think we'll not bother this year.

[LadyCG]

Oh I am sorry to hear that, Xeronema. I'd have ditched the dad a long time ago. By the sound of it she has enough struggles and pain in her life without him adding to it. Some people are just thoughtless and selfish.

I hope, nevertheless, that you both have a lovely, enjoyable Christmas. The TV doesn't look too bad at all this year.

[Xeronema]

I wouldn't know, we've not paid for a TV licence in over 7 years. So, no TV :) I use the living room TV as my computer monitor. The same applies for the wall mounted TV in the bedroom, my OH has it connected to her laptop. I occasionally subscribe to Discovery+ for Deadliest Catch and when I have to bit my tongue and buy Amazon Prime I sometimes watch stuff on Prime Video.

[Xeronema]

Her dad recently had a kidney transplant and now knows what it feels like to suffer from mental health issues as well as physical health restrictions - we thought that maybe he might realise just how difficult it is for us, however it seems not.

I don't think we will be going this year. He hasn't offered up any way to help with her physical health restrictions, and also has no compassion with regard to her physical health issues. We were miserable last year. I know that she'll much prefer and enjoy me cooking us a full Christmas dinner on Christmas day. I might even make a surprise meal for us both, at the table, on the day we would have been going to her dad's house. She doesn't really like surprises (part of her autism), however I think I may be able to do so and not upset her with it.

[LadyCG]

You sound like a very thoughtful person. I can't get thinking, when you mention her dad, that some people should not have kids.

[LadyCG]

*can't help thinking*

[lady-janine]

Good morning all.

Stay at home Christmas sounds best. I am sure that is what I would opt for. It is meant to be enjoyed not endured.

[LadyCG]

Quite so, Lady-J, and good morning to you! I hope you are well?

[Xeronema]

Morning lady-janine, I hope all is well with you :)

Yeah, I often wonder about that, my owner father wasn't much of a father to me and my brother. Her father does everything for his step daughter, she wants for nothing. We hear from her father only when he wants something (usually it's to update his SATNAV). He is coming by this morning to drop off cards and presents (at his convenience, not ours). He knows that when he comes at around 10:30/11:00 that my OH will be with the carers and he won't see her. I've just thought actually, we never bought them a card or present this year, oh well.

[Xeronema]

Morning rowanwitch o/ hopefully you read this message :)

[Xeronema]

A couple of years back I messaged my OH's stepmother, to ask if she could provide support (she has said on more than one occasion that she would be there for both of us and she sees my OH as a daughter).

A couple of hours later I got a very angry phone call from her dad, telling me to not make contact with his wife, that she didn't need the stress. I'd like to add that at the time my OH was in hospital after taking a near fatal overdose. I was struggling to cope and I thought that if my OH spent some time with her stepmum, the change of scene would do her some good. My suggestion was for my OH to spend time with her alone, without me, so it isn't like I'd be getting in the way. I received no support from either of them.

[lady-janine]

Xero - you haven't got him a card or a present. Hmm sounds to me as though you are more than halfway to not going to see him this year. If he is aware that that time is when your OH is with her carers and that is the time he has chosen to visit then it sounds as though he doesn't want either of you with him either. I should give it all a miss and stay by yourselves.

[rowanwitch]

Morning all, been up since five just getting sorted for today's efforts. I don't think I would want to be sitting next to me on the coach but as I am travelling early I might get a double seat to myself

[lady-janine]

Hi LadyCG. I think I'm fine. Just could not sleep despite being late to be and very busy yesterday. We have a leak round a velux window and hopefully someone coming this morning to see if they can fix it. Didn't know about it until went into loft as a landing window was growing tooo much mould even for down here.

[Xeronema]

Yeah, I think I've made up my mind, I don't want to go. If my OH wants to go, I'll do everything I can to try and make it possible. I may even overstep and move the photographs of my OH and put them on the fireplace, rather than them being hidden on the top corner of the bookshelf - where no one can see them. There's a lot of tongue biting when I'm at her dads house lol.

[Xeronema]

lady-janine, good luck, hopefully they will turn up and sort the issue out :)

[lady-janine]

Thanks Xero.

[lady-janine]

good morning rowan. hope your journey goes smoothly.