For Kelley

[Peri]

How is Jess doing ?

[lindapinda]

Hi peri,was wondering that too,today.

[Peri]

Hi Linda, hopefully Kelley will see this.

[Kelley24]

Was looking for my original post, u've saved me looking, thanx

Its not good news i'm afraid. I had to make the very hard decision to let her go to sleep. I've never had such a hard choice to make. We went to the vet at 2pm, and the vet said she couldn't believe she got so bad so quick. She looked like skin n bones but with a very bloated belly, as i said in original message. The vet said this was because her kidneys had completely stopped working and the fluid was staying in her belly, basically meaning that she could have drowned from inside. Also her heart was beating erratic. If i left her to see how she did then she could have died of a heart attack. I didnt want that for her. I wanted her to go with some pride and dignaty (cant spell today, sorry). It was the hardest decision i've had to make cos she was my baby really.

The next choice i have to make is what to do with her now. I can have her cremated with other cats and dogs etc, or cremated on her own and keep her ashes or bring her back home as she is and bury her. I have already ruled out the being cremated with other cats and dogs because i really dont like that idea. But cremating her on her own will cost me �125 on top of the �30 for letting her sleep. I'm on job seekers allowance at the moment so i cant afford that. So i'll prob bury her as she is in the garden under the plant we bought for my step-dad who passed away last year. I think thats the best option. Thank you all for your support.

Kelley x

[Peri]

Hi Kelley, I am so sorry to hear that.  I did go through the exact same last year with pippy my 17 year old cat.  Her kidneys failed and her stomach got extended also.  We buried her at the end of our garden.  You could always plant something nice for Jess or build a little rockery.  I cried for days after pippy so be good to yourself now.  Thinking of you 

[Kelley24]

thank you Peri.

Jess is now safely buried in our back garden. She still looked very peacful when we bought her home. My other 2 cats watched as we buried her which was nice. I'm coping well, very puffy eyes. Was hard telling the family, especially as she was loved by so many people. She will be missed, but she is happy now. I will heal, but she wouldn't have. We keep remembering nice stories about her. for example, i had 1 of her brothers too (Felix) , also an 11th birthday present. But he got attacked by a dog and had majority of his tail removed, but she would spend ages with him on the wall teaching him how to balance again. Nice stories like that are keeping me smiling.

She will be well rememberd. x

[lindapinda]

Oh kelley,so sorry to hear your news.It's one of the worst things you ever have to do.I'll say no more,you and peri,have said it all. xx

[cat woman]

Hi Kelley, Just scanning through the threads and came across your's as I was wondering how little Jess was.  Please accept my heart felt sympathies, time is a great healer but memories will never fade, I know you are hurting, I found comfort in the knowledge that when my Misty passed on that she was a happy, muched loved family member, I hope this helps you too.  My thoughts are with you, take care, God Bless.   xxx   :-(

[Trixiepig]

Kelley,
I felt I had to write as your posts reduced me to tears. I lost my beloved dog Jake, 5 weeks ago to liver failure - he had all the same symptoms as Jess - distended belly etc. It all happened so quickly - I noticed his tummy was bigger than usual on the Sunday evening, and he'd died by Monday lunchtime. Fortunately, I didn't have to make the agonising decision to have him put to sleep, but I would have done as I loved him too much to see him in pain.
When it happened, I felt as if I couldn't go on living - I know that sounds melodramatic, but I'm sure true animal lovers understand - he was like my child - he even used to sleep on my pillow (he was only small) and when he died, my house felt so empty. I began sinking into a depressive state, not wanting to see or talk to anyone - it all seemed so unfair - why my little boy? He'd never hurt anyone and had already had a crap start in life (I rescued him at 3 months old - he was thrown out of a car and left for dead) and what hurt the most was he was only 18 months old - I didn't even have the comfort that he'd lived a full and loving life.
I think I'll always miss him, but this last week a fog lifted. I can see now that I can't change what happened to him - nothing I could ever do will bring him back, but I am safe in the knowledge that no-one could have given him a better life or loved him more.
On a happier note, I adopted a new dog this week - a Staffy Lab cross called Dex. I don't feel guilty because I honestly believe that Jake would have loved to have a brother to play with. Sometimes I look at him and see Jake in his eyes - he's a loving little thing and I like to think Jake sent him to me.
I just wanted to let you know that even though your heart is broken now, the pain will lessen over time. Jess will always be with you just as Jake is with me - just be happy in the knowledge that one day you'll meet again xx

[spangle111]

I'm so sorry to hear your news Kelley. Words seem so inadequate at times like this so I'm sending you a hug and our thoughts are with you, be brave love and remember we're always here for you xx

[Tammera]

i know this is an old post but i thought id add to it as it brought back memories. when i was a year old my mum found my cat in a nest of dead kittens she was the only one to survive, she assumed the mum was wild and got run over as it was by a busy road. she was named cloudy as she was white with grey patches. she was my baby and everything to me, i had a really bad childhood and no matter what happened she was alway there with me, she would always know when i was upset and come and sit with me she was everything to me. when i was 16 i was thrown out and had to live in a hostel for a year and a half and couldnt have her with me it was very upsetting not having her with me but i lived it out. i got my flat when i was 17 and was able to have her although my mum protested saying she was to old and id kill her moving her, the vet told me she would be fine for moving, so i took her.

when she was 18 years old she started getting kidney failure (kidneys are almost always the first to go) like your cat she turned skelleton like and looked so ill, but the vet assured me while shes still eating and drinking shes not unhappy or in pain. she had the steroids every 6 weeks to start with and over time she finally went down to every 2 weeks, it was 10 years ago now so cant really remember how long in total she was on the steroids. everytime i took her for the injections they assured me i wasnt prolonging her like unnessassarily and she was stil happy. towards the end she started dribbling brown stuff (she dribbled anyway as she she only had about 2 teeth), the vet said it was a normal process for kidneys failing. as she was white she would dribble the brown stuff down herself and it looked horrible, i didnt want to bath her as she was old and hated baths the vet said its fine to leave her how she was.

[Tammera]

i can remember one day i got home from work with an rspca card stuck through my letterbox. my cat sat in my window sill alot so someone reported that there was a skinny cat with dried blood down her, i can understand why they thought that id have done the same if i had saw her. i phoned the officer and i explained what the situation was and he said he could see by looking at her through the window she was old and ill and he wouldnt persue anything.
a little while after that, i was sat at home one night and she was acting strange, she was walking would lay down then get straight back up walk to another spot do the same thing in 3 spots the same 3 spots over and over again in a triangle shape. my lodger was there to and i said to him shes acting wierd and he watched her for a bit couldnt understand what was wrong. i told him i think shes getting ready to die. i toyed with the idea of waking the vet up but she was still eating/drinking and they kept telling me not to worry untill she stops eating and drinking, so decided to wait till the next day. i took her to bed and cuddled her all night, she seemed normal the following morning but just kept sleeping, i knew that would be her last day with me. i had to open up the shop that day, i phoned my manager and said i couldnt go as my cats dying but she couldnt get to the shop either so told me to go open it up and she will be there as soon as she can to take over. i phoned my mum to tell her to come over and sit with my cat while i opened the shop if she was going to die she wasnt going to die alone. told my mum to phone me if she got worst and we would take her to the vets and get her put to sleep. she phoned me not long after i got to work and said shes got worst.

[Tammera]

i said come get me from work and we will take her to the vets it wasnt far from my shop. just before she got to my shop, my boss phoned and said shes on her way, i told her that if shes not here before my cat is im closing the shop. my mum got to my shop and she was cuddling her (her husband was driving) i picked her up and gave her a kiss and a cuddle and gave her back to mum and went to lock the shop up just as i walked away she died in my mums arms.

although i felt i should have grown a back bone that day and told my boss the shop can stay closed till she gets there and took the cat straight to the vets, one thing that makes me feel better about my bad choices that day is that my cat died being cuddled by my mum, i vowed that should would die being cuddled and she was.

i decided to get her cremated, shes always been there with me from before i can remember, and i want her to always be with me and when i die i want to be cremated and our ashes mixed together.

my cat was everything to me she was all i lived for, like trixie said i also felt i couldnt go on living, but i tried hard to keep going. after a few weeks i found out i was pregnant and id fell pregnant a couple days before cloudy died, i know it sounds stupid but i wholeheartedly believe that cloudy knew i was pregnant and left me knowing id have something else to live for and love.
sorry for the 3 posts i wrote to much apparently.

[Tammera]

kelly i hope time has healed the pain of a loved pet dieing, its been 10 years since cloudy died and i will always love her and have her with me, times a great healer and over time it will hurt less and less. i wish you well and hope your other cats give you great pleasure and live long.

[Kelley24]

Sorry for your loss too Tammera. Time is a great healer and as long as you have got good memories then you'll a bit better.

I am ok now. Still hurts a bit, but i know i did the right thing. We are palnning to get 2 more cats in the summer (BF is a teacher so he'll be home with them while they settle) because our other 2 Cats, Sophie and Ramsey, are now fighting to be the top cat. Jess was the boss and no cat ever tried to change it. lol So we was thinking that i we got a Tom cat and neutered him etc then he might make himself boss over the the 2 females i have now.

I just think they know Jess has gone and are trying to fill the gap still. If i shout 'Jess' then the other 2 stop fighting and look for her. Its so sad. Didn't think they would miss her as much as me, but i am proved wrong.

Thank you for the support from memebers, i appreciate it.

Kelley xxx