Is Their A 'recipe' For Being Popular?

[Retrochic]

Some people tend to be popular whatever they do, and others are unpopular despite trying their hardest to be 'likeable'. On a newsgroup years ago there was a guy who did some stupid things , wound people up, even brought the NG to a halt with some technical thing he did -yet he remained 'popular' -a 'cheeky rogue'. On the same NG was someone who tried to be polite, helpful (not me I was a right bag) and was constantly being nit-picked on. I've found the same in real life -the popular girls at school were often tear-a ways, bitchy and clique while the nice quiet ones (yes ok me this time) were left out on the edge of social circles. So -what makes someone popular?

[scooping]

No idea. Now shut up.

[anneasquith]

charisma.

[boxtops]

I think it depends what you define as popular, and why people like them. Those tearaway girls at school might have been admired as being a tad dangerous. I firmly believe that in order to have a friend, you have to be one, hell and high water. It's not the greatest aim in my life to be part of any in-crowd.

[royfromaus]

Are you wanting to be popular?

[237SJ]

Confidence.

[Retrochic]

scooping -lol!

popular as in 'can say and do no wrong' They may do something in real life or cyberland and it will be taken differently from if an unpopular person did the same.

[Buenchico]

'Conformity' can appear boring, whereas 'being different' can be seen as being interesting.

Who would you rather get to know? Someone who conforms to the traditional stereotype of a boring accountant or Arthur Daley?

[royfromaus]

They may do something in real life or cyberland and it will be taken differently from if an unpopular person did the same.

Well that is certainly true of cyberland.

[Retrochic]

royfromaus no I just get on with my life couldn't care a less really -I have no friends , not one, my choice. I get on with people and can chat to anyone but don't like friends, prefer my animals.

[Slapshot]

I don't know that you as an individual can do anything other than be yourself.... that can be more appealing that anything else..

Personally .... i'm not bothered whether I'm popular or not, If you don't like who or what I am there absolutely nowt I'm going to do about it

[Retrochic]

Buenchico, I don't agree that most popular people are non-conformist. From my experience the ones that are seen to be 'on trend' are the most popular while the edgy non-conformists are thought of as a bit weird.

[woofgang]

I suspect that in the examples you give Retrochic, people were scared of the "popular" people and what they could do if they took a dislike to you.

[stuey]

Popularity is over-rated, and money can't buy happiness. So there: Now you know that I'm unpopular and poor:)

[stuey]

See, I told you: I'm so unpopular nobody else wants to make a post.

[Retrochic]

its me stuey not you - to quote Harry Enfield: 'I am considerably more un-popular than you'

[Buenchico]

The British stereotype of Canadians (along with Belgians) is that they're boring, Stuey.

So maybe you're right ;-)

[Jeza]

As a young one I was always what others called snooty, I'm not. I later learned it was because I always walked with my shoulders back, my chin held high and my nose in the air. I still walk the same. It's not a deliberate act it is how I have always been.

[kvalidir]

I think I'm one of the edgy non conformists everyone thinks is weird. I find very few people I have anything in common with especially of my own age and try as I might I really couldn't give a stuff what other people think and I think they sense that and thus don't warm to me.
I'm perfectly happy to engage in small talk and take an interest in what other people are interested in but I rarely find the opposite applies:)

[stuey]

That's not fair, Retrochic; you appear to have a superior inferiority complex to mine, Just for that, and Chris' interjection, I'm off in search of wobbly-pops...So there!

[Cloverjo]

I think the bitchy girls at school seemed to be popular because lots of other girls hung around them to avoid the chance of being bullied or bitched about by them.
If you were nice and quiet (me too) no one noticed you, and if they did you weren't a threat so didn't need to be befriended, however lovely you might be.