Paying on First Date ?

[peterd]

My girlfriends sister was on a date Sat night. However I was surprised that she went out with no money at all, not even any cards. I only found out cos my girlfriend said we might end up picking her up later as she's no money on her! I thought it was a joke but turned out to be true. She is very independent (own business, house, car etc) but insists there is nothing with this. I thought this quite odd but she doesn't see anything wrong with it. She's not a golddigger or tart but just wondering if any ladies out there would do the same ? She really likes the guy & couldn't wait to see him. She is 37 if it makes any difference.

[WendyS]

It seems pretty irresponsible to me to go out at night without carrying any money and expect friends to bail you out in an emergency. What happens if she gets herself into a difficult situation and needs to call a taxi, etc.? I'm too far distant from the dating scene these days to know who is expected to pay for what on a date, but if I were in those circumstances I'd certainly expect to pay my own share until the relationship was mature enough for some consensual agreement on who pays.

[brawburd]

I would never go out without money in my pocket. She doesn't sound very independent or very sensible to me.

[Grunty]

I am an old (by some standards) male, and the women I have been out with recently have insisted on paying their share. The last one had a spare compartment in her purse, into which we both put equal amounts when necessary. It doesn't matter to me if I pay on the first date, but I have to agree with Wendy. I have never intentionally treated a woman badly, but what if she had needed to get away?

[Miss Zippy]

I think it�s most odd! I�m a few years younger than your girlfriend�s sister but I wouldn�t dream of going out (whether on a first date or otherwise) without any money with me and I can�t think that any of my friends would. She doesn�t sound very intelligent or independent if she can�t even make her own way to a date and back! More seriously, she is putting herself in a very vulnerable position should she need to make a hasty exit for any reason. With regards to paying on a first date, it�s up to the individuals. Though I personally do expect the man to pay on a first date, I will always offer to pay my share.

[smudge]

I used to have a friend like that peterd - I said, I used to have a friend like that....Seriously, she used to take it for granted that everyone else around her, male of female would pay her way. She was also the sort of person that would go to a party, take the cheapest bottle of plonk, then drink their expensive shorts all night.

I on the other hand, wouldn't dream of going anywhere without money - after all you never know when you're going to be taken short & need to spend a penny!

[milly143]

It does seem a bit odd. Even if I was expecting someone else to pay for everything I would still at least take my cash card with me. What would she have done if he asked her to pay a share of if his card got declined?

[Iz66]

i would never go out without money! especially on a first date! Sounds quiet irresponsible...infact it sounds mad!

[woofgang]

Well I agree with everyone else, its not very polite and could be downright dangerous!!

[lightoftruth]

Yes i agree that it was irresponsible of the girl, however when it comes to dating i do it the gentleman way and always pay, until it gets semi serious that is

[Englishbird]

I'm 30 and would never go out without money, and would never expect anyone, man, woman, date or not, to pay for me.

I'm not directing this at your girlfriends sister, obviously I don't know what she's like, but I have a few women that come into the pub I work in that do this, and it drives me insane.

One in particular comes in with absolutely nothing, manages to get blind drunk, orders rounds and then gets someone else to pay for them. I hate it (and I don't think I conceal my animosity too well either!) The men don't seem to like it much either - but they still do it!!!!! What's all that about!!!!????

[sammd]

I never leave the house without my wallet. If someone buys me a drink, i buy them one back. I can't believe some girls, it gives the rest of us a bad reputation! I've heard guys complaining how girls expect them to pay for everything and it's not right. I can imagine broke students being cheeky but for someone that old with enough money....! Here's to going dutch!