dreaming

[ladorada]

I am trying to translate some poems into English, but I am not always sure of every nuance of a word or expression. What do you think of the following one?

dreaming

a bird with two bodies
was drawing near in twin flight from its world
it was searching for nest in me
I was waiting eyes wide open all day all night
its feathers were rustling wriggling for a moment
to enter under my eyelids
from beak to clutches �
to deposit an egg in my strawy thoughts

[jno]

sounds okay to me - one of the things about poetry is that it doesn't have to obey the rules of grammar, and that even individual words don't have to bear their exact normal meanings. I'm not sure what the word 'clutches' means here (claws?) and I would say 'a nest' rather than just 'nest', but then poetry is often slightly mysterious.

[arwenant]

which language are you translating from?
its sounds ok but poems don't tend to translate very well because of rhyme and meter.
Teresa. X.

[ladorada]

Thank you, Jno. Yes, the clutches are claws. Probably I should have used claws or talons, but I like the sound of clutches.

Arwenant, it's from Romanian.