Want to say something :-(

[wiggal]

Ok, to cut it short!

My fella, (will call him A!) his ex cheated on him, he had been with her over 4 years, and whilst they were together she fell pregnant with someone elses baby. When he found out, she was then long gone, went off with new bloke, had her baby and got married.
I'm not a violent person, and avoid any kind of disagreement, but knowing what she did to him has always really got to me.

When they were together she worked as a hairdresser, at the shops 2 mins from our house. A would nevr even show me a picture of her, in case I bumped into her (good choice!)! But now, she has come back to work at the hairdressers 2 minutes away!

It was bad enough moving into the house she lived in and was her 'home' but now it just winds me up that she has come back!
A has said that she wouldnt even dare speak to him down the shops (we go there everyday after work), but I just cant stand knowing that some one who screwed him over and hurt him so much is literally just down the road, and I cant even 'bump' into her!

I'm thinking I'm justa twisted head case of a girlfriend, but I feel she is far too close in my 'comfort zone'!

Pfft!

[Octavius]

And what does he feel about it?

[wiggal]

He wants nothing at all to do with her! He found out she was back, because she also used to work in the offie at the shops, I now work at the h/o of the offie she worked at and know the staff well. She went into the shop, and asked the mgr if A was still around, and when she said yes, she asked her to pass on the message to say hi and hopes he is well!

He was pretty peed off to find out she had come back to work in the area we live in, as she still knew he lived round here. And came straight home and told me.

Just really gets to me that not only can she hurt him so so much, but she can then come back to work so close to our home! Yes she has every right to work where she wants, but if you are going to ruin someone, and hurt them so much, atleast have some respect for them after!

Grrrrrrrrrrrrr!

[Jafi]

i know it's hard but i would just let it lie, really it's for the best. She did the dirty on him and i can understand your anger, but it was in the past, you are now his future, not her. Do you really wish to open all the old wounds up again?
Rise above it.

[wiggal]

Hey legend,

I'm not jealous!! He wouldnt even look at her in the street!
It is just the first thing in my life so far that has peed me off so much that I would like to go and get my hair done for no reason, just to be in a room with her!

[Jillius]

Try to look at it in a positive way. If she hadn't done what she did , they might still be together and you wouldn't have him ! She did you all a favour and as long as he doesn't want her back then just ignore her.

[Octavius]

He has moved on and so should you. It is jealousy and you are in danger of letting it interrupt and affect the relationship he has with you.

Just let it go, he is with you now, no need to drag up his past for him as he will resent you for it.

[wiggal]

Makes me feel even worse, that he didnt just find out from a mate, but he was suspicious, so he asked his best mate to drive him to follow her on a 'girls night out'. He then saw her going up to a door and kissing another bloke.

Why? why would you do it to someone?

Ok, he winds me up something stupid, but nothing he could ever have done would deserve what she did to him. And when he confronted her, she told him she was pregnant with the other blokes kid.

Sorry, I just cant get my head round it! Let alone knowing how close she works to our home everyday, and I cant do anything!

[Octavius]

I don't understand why you would want or need to do anything at all.

So what if she did all this to him, he is past it. Let it go.

You are starting to scare me now.

[lajohn]

Wiggal - you come across as jealous, evil and vindictive in your post. Why should that bother you? It�s between your fella and his ex. He's the one who should be angry and hurt. In a twisted sense I think you should be grateful she cheated on him otherwise you might not be with him today.

[Ice.Maiden]

Hi Wiggal. I can't understand why you want to do anything at ALL? She's got someone else's baby - not one belonging to your bf, she's now married, and you say you partner's not interested...so I can't see what the problem is. There are loads of people working or living near to ex's, but it only becomes when as issue when you have something to really worry about.
Whatever she did to your bf in the past, is history. What bothers you so much?

[China Doll]

Sweetie, with the best will in the world...

Are you angry because she hurt him or because she's in your territory?

I mean either way it isn't going to be resolved by 'bumping' in to each other but it might be better for you to take a deep breath and a step back and look at the reasons for your anger.

Then let it go anyway.

[wiggal]

Octavius, no need to worry! I'm actually a huge wimp and cant even stand up for myself.

Basically, I just cant understand how she could do something like that to him, when he is such a loving caring bloke, and to know she hurt him so bad really gets to me!

Ok, so maybe I definaitely am the headcase girlfriend everyone dreads lol!

But like has been said, I just need to find my way of dealing with my anger towards her. We have been together over 4 years now, and I know he loves me, and he has told me recently that he wants to commit to me for the rest of our lives!

[Octavius]

Great! So don't go spoiling what you have now by getting hung up on his ex.

All the best.

[China Doll]

I 100% agree with Octavius on this one Wiggal. It sounds like all you have going for you are positives so I see no reason to dwell on this at all.

It's just a smelly fart, nasty and horrid and irritating but it does fade away.

[wiggal]

China hun,

I have always just been angry that he hurt him so much.

Finding out recently that she had come back to work so close to where we live, when she had moved away has just brought it all out I think.

[Jafi]

lol @ china doll, loved the way you compared that

[China Doll]

But he has you now and she can't hurt him anymore and you make up for all the kak.

Like I said, she's a smelly fart and you're that odour vapouriser that doesn't just cover the smell but gets rid of it.

Or at least that's what I think I said. :c)