Child and housing probs after separation

[kitty1981]

Hi, i am sorry but this might be a long one. I have been living with someone for 5 years, with a joint mortgage. Last year we decided to have a baby and he was born in oct. I found out when i was heavily pregnant that he was seeing someone else and that he had actualy got her pregnant too only she had a termination. He was violent towards me on a regular basis but stupid me never reported him and he was forever saying that he didnt want the baby. I had nowhere else to live so ended up staying where i was, hoping that it would eventually get better.
My baby was born and he did nothing to help out, no feeding, no changing etc. He was still seeing her and making my life a misery. A few weeks ago i decided enough was enough and asked him to leave, which he did, and i have since found out that she is pregnant again and due in 2 months. He is still paying the mortage and says he will continue to do so but i feel i will never be able to move on with my life as he can come and go as he pleases.
recently my nan died and has left her house to my mum. my mum has said that she is going to rent it out and i would really like to move there to start afresh. My x refuses to put hte house up for sale or to buy me out. i feel trapped.
If i went to rent the house could i get any help paying for it with my name still on this mortgage, if not, is there anything i can do to ensure that either he keeps paying it (as his maintenance) or to remove my name from it.
Is there anything i can do regarding access... i dont want him having our son and spending time with the other woman and her baby... i understand that the baby will be related to him but i really dont want anything to do with them! How would i explain to my son about it all?

Any help would be gratefully received as i feel TOTALLY trapped and scared.

[Ethel]

You can apply to the court for an application of 'division and sale'.

This means the court orders the house to be sold - it very rarely refuses the application (specially adapted house for severely disabled person is one example where a sale may be refused).

See a solicitor straight away.

[Jaybird37]

I agree with Ethel, go and see a solicitor.

Make sure that you report any future acts of violence, either with your doctor or the police, or both, so that there is a record of his history.

If he has a history of violence towards you then he should not be seeing your son unsupervised, but you need to be able to back up why you think that.

As far as explaining stuff to your son, don't worry about that now. Your son is much too young to explain anything to as yet, and you have much more pressing things to sort out first.

I am sorry to hear you have had such a miserable time, but I hope you enjoy your little boy. Please believe, things will get better.