i wrote a wee poem what do you think?

[lauratwentyeight]

The thorns cut deep and i bleed the rose
The sting will last beyond cuts close
The endless run of blood still flows
the warmth and heat shall never go..

... Worth something i later fared but never to tell
carried close beside with this shell
Time will take me a long way ahead
past this thrashing the peaceful dead.

[sandyRoe]

Food for thought. Is it about outliving an abuser?

[lauratwentyeight]

no its about broken love lol ;)

[MarkRae]

What does "I bleed the rose" mean?

"warmth and heat" is a bit of a tautology.

What does "Worth something I later fared but never to tell" mean?

[sandyRoe]

I'll never be a literary critic, I see :-(

[lauratwentyeight]

i bleed the rose means i bleed the rose the rose is love and the blood the joy of love and the the thorns the pain,

worth something i later fared means bascially it was worth something in my life later on i fared from the exsperence, and never tell means well it was a secret love that will never be spoken

[Mick-Talbot]

You're quite a livewire Laura ;0)

[lauratwentyeight]

hey im no poet im just trying my hand at it for the first time lol

[MarkRae]

Hmm - I don't think "fared" means what you think it does... :-)

[lauratwentyeight]

im a bit of a recluse the internet become a place of sharing sorry lol

[thenry]

I like the way you break the structure at the start of the second stanza but maintain the rhythm.

[lauratwentyeight]

fared to fare well thats where i got the term lol

[MarkRae]

Fare means "proceed" or "get along", as in "How is she faring in her new job?"

"Farewell!" means "Proceed well in the rest of your life" - it's something said when you don't think you'll ever see each other again...

[lauratwentyeight]

i say i later fared well from this exsperence simple as that no im not an educated person obviously but its my poem and to me thats the mean of the word

[TheWinner]

It makes me sad that you always need approval Laura, you have a lovely singing voice and are talented in so many ways, just be yourself and please know, that I love to see your posts. It doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. You are who you are, and if others don't like it, it's their loss. x

[lauratwentyeight]

the winner thankyou, your right i guess its not just approval its sharing its advice and i suppose theres always going to be good and bad lol! very much appritiate you taking the time to listen or read my posts thankyou! ;) x