urgent help!!!!!

[dolliebaby]

ok please help ma out....
is sex first time always painful for the girl??? this is quite embarrassing.... my bf i tried... but it just wud not even go in ... cos it was paining.... why do u think that wud happen??? is it that im subconsciously not ready??? but my bf n i love each other a lot... what can i do for being able to have easy sex! or does it always pain.... some experienced people please help....
im from a small town in gujrat, india ... i can not speak about sex openly to anyone here cos we all r still quite old fashioned n especially since im unmarried as pre marital sex is considered something awful here in my town....
sushmita

[soph0205]

u will deff know wen the time is right. If you think now is the time then you have to be comftable take it easy and relax. I had such trouble losing my virginity it hurt so much and carried on hurtin all the time and then i learned how to relax and take it easy if you tense up it will hurt so much more but if relax youll enjoy it.
Im not sayin its not gunna hurt coz it will ur not used to summin goin up you so course it will hurt but relax and it will make it much easier.

gd luck x

[Banana Boat]

When i first had sex, it was uncomfortable. it wasn't a horrable experiance, although i wasn't great as i was drunk and it was just a one night stand, but a few times after that, when i had sex, it was also a bit painful, and i bleld a bit aswell. but after a whilw it goes away and you will start to enjoy it. You need to make sure you are relaxed and not tense, or else it will gurt even more.

[teag1rl]

I'm no expert but do they use english slang like 'cos' in a small town in GUJARAT? Wind up.

[johnlambert]

Sounds like vaginismus, the muscles around your vagina essentially spasm, preventing comfortable penetration (and sometimes preventing any penetration at all). If your culture frowns upon sex before marriage then your mind would be telling your body to tense up causing the spasms.
It's quite normal the first time you have sex, it happens here in the West where we are more sexualy active than in some Eastern cultures, it has happened to one of my ex girlfriends the first time we had sex and it was her first time. It will be more comfortable as you learn to relax (ask him to be very patient and gentle and not to penetrate you until you are very very moist down there!!

[dolliebaby]

teag1rl, would have been happier had you sent a reply to my question anyway im frm damnagar,gujrat. are u from india? cos is just short form of because... more than a slang i picked it up from the internet n i did my college in mumbai!
thanks for ur replies....

[dolliebaby]

Sounds like vaginismus, the muscles around your vagina essentially spasm, preventing comfortable penetration (and sometimes preventing any penetration at all).
that sounds scary.....

[jno]

not scary, just your body rebelling a bit against what your mind wants to do. You need to be relaxed, and very few people are the first time. Can you maybe get lubricating cream like KY Jelly from a pharmacist? Also, condoms are usually lubricated - I hope you're using some form of contraception if not condoms. Because if you're afraid of getting pregnant you'll really be tense.

[sarah1987]

hello, well my first time was very painful but that was probably cus i didnt know what to expect. after that it was less painful as i was much more relaxed and was not tense. you will just have to try to relax and everythin will go smoothly