Another woe is me thread...

[kat2206]

Self pity party for one coming up...

Ok...so let's recap. Partner of 6 years dumps me in 2011 for an older model.. Me being me goes down the " oh my god, I'm crap" route... Followed by lots of lovelies on here and thus me having a word with myself... Goes to a day spa, hair done, new job = everything looking good.

However, little did I know that a certain single, local man has 'liked'me for approx 4 years now and to be honest ive always had a second glance when hes about too, anyway, he took me on a date last week, it went very well :)

Fast forward to this weekend, I'm going away with work on Monday for 3 days so Mr Man told me he would take me out tonight again, result! Until 3pm... He got a phone call from a mate and dropped our date for his mates... Feeling a little deflated..

Now.... Am I making too much out of this or should I just let it pass and move on or just wait til he rings me...

As I'm writing this, I am actually arguing with myself... I'm nearly 44 for gods sake! Why am I acting like a love sick teenager?

[ummmm]

Hmmmm.....How did he cancel? Did he ask if it's okay? Did he make arrangements for another date?

[starone]

Don't get so worried about one man. There are plenty more out there both willing and able. Play the field. You have attracted two - the two you have told us about so there is no reason why you shouldn't attract more. Try to be more self-confident, and don't care so much when they let you down. You will meet one who will last the course eventually.

[Prudie]

What was he going to do with his mates? - there was quite a major rugby game on today that a lot of women will have taken second place to, if so that's possibly excusable.

[douglas9401]

As a man of a certain age can I ask, before you two hooked up did your new beau spend most of his time propping up the bar with his other (single) mates?
If yes he's running scared of the new potential situation, if no don't sit around waiting for the call, if it comes it comes in the meantime get out there and get on with your life.

[naomi24]

Don't let anyone mess you about because if they do it once, they'll do it again. When he rings, hang on to your self respect and tell him you're busy. Just file him away in the archives where he belongs and shout NEXT - and before you know it, just like buses, another will be along shortly. :o)

[jno]

he's probably not yet committed to you after only one date, so a ticket for Twickenham (or something) at short notice might outrank what he may see as a casual offer to you. It doesn't necessarily mean it's all over before it's started.

As ummmm says, the actual way he did it may make a difference. Meanwhile, try not to get yourself more hooked on him than he is on you. You don't have to settle for the first guy who speaks pleasantly to you.

[karenmac60]

If he ditched you to go out on the Fosters with his mates- flump him. If he was being a good friend to someone in need, he's a keeper.

[DaisyNonna]

Possibly because you feel like a lovesick teenager. Nothing wrong with that. When he rings tell him how disappointed you were. Explain that breaking a date at so short notice meant that you could not accept other arrangements which had been suggested.

[kat2206]

He's been on his own for 2 years so I guess it's going to be difficult for him to take someone's feelings into consideration... Or maybe I'm letting him off FAR too easily lol.. Or it has something to do with having a takeout pizza rather than a nice meal with nice company?!

[ummmm]

Yes, but how did he tell you? What excuse did he use?

[kat2206]

He popped over and told me that he had to go for a shoot with his mates ( he's a farmer). And that if I wanted to, I could meet him at the pub with his mates for a meal..l. Ummmmmm no thanks!

[ummmm]

That's not a bad sign....the invite was still there.

[DaisyNonna]

Why did he 'have' to go?

[kat2206]

Yeah, I guess...

[China Doll]

I might have been inclined to go to the pub and enjoy the night out. He didn't blow you off completely, he changed his plans but he still included you. I think you're making too much of it.

[ummmm]

And including you, on a second date, with his mates....that can't be a bad sign.

[karenmac60]

How many of us get pissed off with friends who dump us the minute a new man comes on the scene? He wasn't just going down the pub to watch the rugby with his mates, he was helping them out and he invited you along for the fun part - and was prepared to introduce you to his friends. 2 years alone or not, he actually sounds like a fairly decent bloke. Don't be too put out and don't give him too hard a time over it.

[Slapshot]

....but if he's reading this you're bolloxed...;-)

Bloke sounds ok...someone offerd me a free international ticket she could go shopping or whatever it is women do when us chaps are doing important stuff..;0) Play along he sounds okay

[netibiza]

I would have gone with him and his mates, sounds like great fun!