Hi babyface29.
I know exactly what you mean. I have a really high instep but i don't have long toes, mine are all bent - they look a bit like claws!.
I also have what looks like a large swelling at the base of my big toe which for years I had thought was a bunion, caused by wearing tight pointed shoes. this used to cause me extreme pain.
I eventually went to the doctors who referred me to a specialist.
I then found out it wasn't a bunion it was all to do with my high instep. I was told i could have an operation which might help or i could have some insoles made for me that would help.
I opted for the insoles which kind of filled the gap that my instep was making. they did take a bit of getting used to but they did help, I had a lot less pain.
I must admit that now, some 5-6 years later I don't bother with the insoles but I very rarely have any pain and if i do I've still got the insoles.
So after giving you a short history of my feet!! My advice would be to go and speak to your doctor, (yes, your boyfriend does seem to know what he is talking about!)
Good luck xXx