Stay or Go?

[Sydme]

I need advice. Im married with 2 children 12 and 16. My husband started having manic episodes in 2005 and was given paroxetine which helped him. He came off it last year with the help of our doctor but last xmas he began having fits of rage smashing plates for no reason. I forced him to see the doctor who put on sertraline and diazapam and refered him to a consultant who put my husabnd on an antipsycotic. he still sees the consultant but all last week he started being nasty again. He gives me the most awful verbal abuse and told me on sunday he wanted me and the kids out. I told him he should see either our doctor or his consultant but he wont. He pays the mortgage on the home. I just dont know what to do. See a solicitor about a divorce or stay and hope he goes back to the doctor. He is tee total so it cant be that.Thank you.

[sexyrussiann]

I'm no specialist but I have enough mental illness in my family to understand you completely.I won't go into it as everyone on here will just find ways to accuse me of lying but my advice to you is to leave the relationship.My Aunty was married to a man with manic depression and she chose to stay but he ended up commit suicide in a trult horrific way and she never got over it. Even if he goes on medication he will never be "normal". It's your only option.I know how you kust be feeling good luck and take care xxx

[bigmamma]

Hello Sydme, you talk about divorce , is it your husband you no longer want , or his behavior fuelled by his psychotic state of mind ? First of all of course is the safety and well being of you and your children , you do not want to put them in any danger or have them upset watching his.
It may be his meds need adjusting . Perhaps you can have a talk to your gp who may be able to get you a professional person to talk over your options.
Do you have somewhere safe you can go to stay if you need to ?

[cazzz1975]

This must be having an awful affect on the kids, my advice would be for you to leave at least for the time being until he sorts himself out. Its not an easy option but at the kids ages with school to deal with as well its just not fair for them to be living in such a volatile environment.

find somewhere to go, or phone up the womens refuge, either way get away for a while to give you and your kids a break from walking on eggshells.

from experience I can tell you that kids want a happy stable environment, I bet they have become withdrawn as a result.
do it for them, if only temporarily at the very least

[Scarlett]

I agree with the above advice. Your kids come first. Many women think they are being strong by putting up with abuse and staying with a partner who is bad for them "for the sake of the kids". It is often braver to just get out. This will give him the space he needs to decide what he wants to do about his condition.

[sexyrussiann]

Nothing can truly be done about this condition. Manic Depression is not cureable and I know because I know people with it. He could take medicaltion after medication but trust me all it will do is calm him down. He will still be disturbed and difficult.