You can't get rid of stretch marks ever. They are caused by the separation of layers beneath the surface of the skin and therefore anything you apply to the top layer doesn't really make any difference. They start off a purplish colour and do fade to white over time, but they don't go away. Sorry but you'll have to learn to live with them.
I find palmers cocoa butter formula really helps. Although you cannot get rid of them entirely this reduces there appearance quite a bit. Have you considered going on a detox diet?
if i knew the answer to that i'd be very rich (and happy)! i have heard bio oil can help though. i'd like to find out what the famous people use. they all seem to be immune to stretchies!
Use Palmers Cocoa Butter. Massage it on and it really does work, thats what I'm using right now and my stretch marks are almost gone. It also works great on cellulite.