When jokes fall flat.

[B00]

Ever get the feeling that others just don't "get you?"

Today was Mini Boo's school sports day and she did wonderfully, however her team didn't win so as a joke I jokingly told her, in front of the other mums that she now wouldn't be getting any tea due to her miserable failure. Mini Boo just rolled her eyes at me as she "got me" and is sadly used to my sometimes quite odd humour, however the mums surrounding me looked at me in horror.

I'm sure at least 3 of them were on the phone to social services before we'd even left the playing field :-(

[emmie]

naughty mummy, slap wrist... x

[China Doll]

People are weird... that would have made me laugh.

I still remember telling my dad when I got 100% or an A on something and him telling me 'it's not good enough and try harder next time'....

[Smowball]

Lol you evil mother!

[DTCwordfan]

I was going to respond to this by "Bit like Jemisa's....."

No, I love set up stories like this. For example:

Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog
chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out
line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant? So since I'm retired and have
little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again.

I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in
the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened
in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices
and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that
it works is, to load your pants pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply
eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally
complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog
food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a
poodle's ass and a car hit me.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
laughing so hard.

Costco won't let me shop there anymore.

[B00]

See CD? Now that humour I get!

Mind you, Elder Mini Boo is still annoyed that we bought her an iron for her Christmas present when she was 15- personally I just thought she was being bloody ungrateful.

[ummmm]

It's exactly what I would do!!

Problem is...I have teenagers now and it's backfired. They are now doing it to me :-)

[B00]

DT! I'm shocked at you!

That joke's so old it's drawing its pension :P

[gness]

Boo. I have the same problem. I have big eyes, a sad face and wicked sense of humour so my joking tends to look serious. Times I have to explain.

[bookbinder]

If you want to make a living as a stand-up comic, you have to be able to size up your audience before you start your routine!

[B00]

i don't bother explaining anymore gness, keep 'em guessing, keep em guessing ;-)

[DTCwordfan]

giving you irons for birthdays (I assume for pressing and not manacles), ummmm, or being "intelligently cheeky"?

[tinkerbell23]

Id have laughed at that boo xx

[DTCwordfan]

bookbinder, for many around here it would be firstly assessing whether the audience was sitting don or standing before even getting to the sizing up bit.

[DTCwordfan]

down....not don

[albaqwerty]

My sons played in the same footy team. One was a striker and scored. Shouted well done, you'll get your dinner.
Other one was a goalie, he pulled off a great save, shouted, great, I'll feed you as well.
Only one other mum thought it funny. I liked her.

[B00]

Perhaps I should explain DT...

One of elder Mini Boo's chores as a teen was the ironing. Near Christmas when she was about 15 the iron broke, so we obviously had to buy a new one, but as a joke, we wrapped it and put it under the tree and hid all the real ones we'd bought her away. Then we spent about a fortnight building this "present" up to be something fantastic to the point where she was giddy with excitement by Christmas morning.

I'll never forget her face when she opened it- it was fantastic!

[bookbinder]

OK, DTcrosswordfan, I get the picture!

[DTCwordfan]

Now that I like....

sun is back out, so "drawing resumes play".

[parkie]

We had a couple of young Welsh neighbours who were told us they were moving back to Wales.
With my warped sense of humour I said, "Oh that's good. You lower the tone of the neighbourhood."
Unbeknown to me they took it seriously and moved away before I was able to apologise. They were a really nice couple too!!

[B00]

lol parkdale, now that I like :-)