My friend's worried

[Tock389]

Have a friend who has just started seeing a girl. She is very down to earth, and in fact asked him out originally. The thing is, although my friend has a good job with prospects, he can't help worrying that his new girlfriend earns much more than him. She is a manager for a big company, and probably earns 10k a year more than him. Have tried to explain that money isn't everything, and if it was, she wouldn't have gone for him in the first place, but he won't listen. Can someone give me some tips on how to placate my friend? Am running out of advice...

[inferno]

Tell him to grow up!

[GucciGal]

Hello Tock389, don't know about tips but when I met my gorgeous hubby I earned twice as much as he did. But you know what? ..........  he now earns twice as much as me! Stuff changes ....

Don't let this stop him from having a fab relationship with someone who obviously doesn't mind what he earns!

[woofgang]

Your friend has to sort this one out for himself. The heart wants what it wants and if it matters to him, then it matters. He has to decide if he can deal with it and how much he wants to. Sorry and I know that you want to help, but I think he needs to think this one out himself

[londondave]

Times have changed, men are not always the bread winner these days, and it is old fashioned of him to care! My girlfriend earns �6300 more than me plus overtime and we have been together 10 years since she was a student earning minus �0.

[jake-the-peg]

You say just started so nobody's probably at this stage yet but it's not quite that simple as "growing up" if there is a consideration of children.

Then they'd need to decide if they wanted to go down the childcare route or if one of them was going to give up work. In the case of the latter who would that be?

Would she want to but feel that they couldn't sacrifice the money? Would he not want to take on that role?

It may be that your friend has these considerations nagging at the back of his mind but doesn't want to acknowlege them publicly because he's only just started seeing her and it would seem undue haste.

Or maybe it is just a dumb ego thing and he does just need to "grow up"