Bf trouble

[xorue]

My boyfriend has always been really nice and all of a sudden he's been miserable whenever we're together, im scared he's chesting on me because he always seems like he wants to be somewhere else. He said something really horrible to me the other day and i havent heard from him since as i walked away from him. I think he's using this as an excuse to break up, even though we've got a holiday booked together, anyone relate?

[landie]

Don't worry, you're better off without him if that's his manner.

[rampart]

My guess is that he's trying to figure out how to end the relationship. Some guys don't want to hurt a girl, so to reduce the pain of a breakup, he finds a way to let her dump him. Perhaps he said something horrible so that you could dump him.

As it stands, the pending holiday doesn't sound much fun... might want to rethink that.

If he wasn't trying to send breakup signals to you, what does that mean?

[keen2learn]

He wants to break up but he's afraid to say so, so he's hoping you'll pick up on his 'subtle' (not!) hints and do it for him, then he won't have to feel guilty. Sorry about the holiday - can you go with a friend instead? Might cheer you up! Landie's right, you're better off without him. You deserve someone who isn't an emotional coward.

[hinge1967]

How long have you been together? How old is he? What else may be going on in his life? Is he drinking? Taking drugs? Got problems with his family?

His behaviour sounds out of character from what you say, and people react in all sorts of strange ways when there are pressures.

Its quite possible that he is avoiding the responsibilty of splitting up with you, and trying to making you take resonsibility for it, but there may be more to it.

If you want to and you get the chance I would ask him directly and openly if he wants out. I If that is the case let him go, and find someone better when you feel able. If he says nothing or doesn't want to talk about what is going on for him, then make it clear that the decision whether to continue the relationship is all yours. Think carefully about the effect staying in a relationship where he won't communicate will affect you.

[xorue]

nearly a year, nearly 18, no, no, not really and i know you'l all say he's only 18 he doesnt want to be tied down or anything but he says he does. Still no word but im not ringing or txting him because i always do if we fall out so i want to see how long it will take or if he ever will  

[kazzee69]

It does sound a bit strange that he is suddenley being like this. If and when you next speak to him I'd ask him out right what going on. But it does sound like he is trying to shut you out and annoy you so maybe you will get sick of him. Maybe he wants to end things but doesn't know how. If I was you I'd be as nice to him as I could and make him realise that I'm not letting him get out of this one so easily.