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Rather Keen Teenage Boy - Should I Be Worried?

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Black Noir | 13:30 Fri 07th Feb 2014 | Family & Relationships
8 Answers
My 16 year old daughter has a boy in her year with a social anxiety disorder.
He started talking to her about a year ago over a mutual interest in Marvel characters, and since then he has religiously waited outside school for her each morning rain or shine, as well as after school (even if she goes to a revision club)
He asked her out some months ago but she declined, she is happy to be his friend but is in no respect attracted to him.
Since then he has stepped it up a gear, logging on to the school website to do her homework for her ( which she is v annoyed about) and she has found out he is writing a book about her and has applied to go to the same college!
Because of his disorder she doesn't know how to deal with what is becoming a rather scarey and intense issue!
Any advice greatly received
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I think it's a parent's job to be worried all the time. He does seem overkeen. Probably still under the illusion that one can prove oneselvf to the individual one is interested in and convince them to reciprocate. He'll learn. Meanwhile, in your shoes, I'd advice your daughter of the possible dangers and suggest she be very very clear to him what her position...
17:59 Fri 07th Feb 2014
I would be contacting the Headmaster / mistress as a first step.
I think it's a parent's job to be worried all the time. He does seem overkeen. Probably still under the illusion that one can prove oneselvf to the individual one is interested in and convince them to reciprocate. He'll learn. Meanwhile, in your shoes, I'd advice your daughter of the possible dangers and suggest she be very very clear to him what her position is; and how it isn't going to change, so can he stop being so overly pushy/helpful. He's probably harmless, just trying to win fair lady, but worth her making the situation very clear.
I think she should speak to her teacher. It's up to them to deal with it and to help her change her online password (not sure how simple it is on the school websites).
Does the school have a pastoral care officer that she can speak to in confidence? Apart from the obvious attachment to your daughter, the school needs to be aware about the on-line homework issue - don't the pupils have their own log-ins? It's not something she can manage on her own, if there is no pastoral officer then you need to speak to the head teacher.
yes - as boxtops says the homework thing is worrying - in effect it must look as if someone else is doing her homework for her, and she really needs to reeport that asap if only to (potentially) clear her own name from any future accusations of cheating.
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Thanks for all your comments.
I did end up calling the school on Friday and they were very quick to step in and speak to the young lad. He was mortified that he was doing anything wrong or indeed had been upsetting my daughter and making her feel uncomfortable.
The school are also going to address the online student login, because sirname/date of birth clearly isnt secure !!
Hopefully things will revert to normality now...being a parent hurts my head sometimes !!

So glad you have got somewhere with this, it seems his social ineptitude led him to put your daughter on a pedestal and as such could only see what he did as good.

Now explained things will settle I am sure.

You are right Parenthood is a tough call sometimes.
"because surname/date of birth clearly isn't secure"

You might be surprised how common this sort of lax "security" is in academia. It would not surprise me one bit if there is no facility for users even to change their password...

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