Is My Fwb Catching Feelings? Or What

[AntoniaMarie]

my fwb is a coworker that I've known for a year now. We work opposite shifts so if anything were to happen I would never see him. Anyway, we agreed to be loyal *** friends (this is what he called it) so we've been seeing each other about twice a week. I asked him a month after we Started this what he meant by loyal and he said not to sleep with other people and laughed. He doesn't want a commited relationship, at least not so soon. He said not to think that far ahead Yet but I know he's not a fan of commitment. We use condoms every time we have sex but Doesn't wAnt me to sleep around? And doesn't want a relationship? I'm confused. When we get ready for bed we talk before, and his leg or foot has to be touching me. Like he stopped in Mid sentence before just to his leg underneath mine and then continue to talk. He says in his only *** buddy And I believe him because he works a lot and has three kids to take care of on his off day. Is he catching feelings? Or doesn't want to rush things? He calls me here and there just to talk and we get a long great. I keep reading online that it's possesiveness but idk

[Old_Geezer]

Only he knows how he feels. Only you know whether the existing arrangement suits you or not. If concerned then talk with him. Folk have already pointed out risks. But do consider how you feel. Do you think it would spoil or improve your relationship were he getting emotional ? What do you really want from the future ? Discuss this with him to either reassure yourself things aren't changing or to encourage him to find the courage to commit again, as appropriate.

[AntoniaMarie]

Yes

[AntoniaMarie]

I'm thinking he's just been in bad relationships and maybe is torn in the inside because maybe he screwed up.

[AntoniaMarie]

Yes Usa

[waterboatman]

You need to have a serious talk with him Antonia. Your feeling matter just as much as his. If he can't see that then he's not being fair to you, and never will be.

[ummmm]

It's friends with benefits. He's told you he doesn't want commitment so you have to either accept that and be happy with how it is....or end it. You're reading too much into his actions.

Safe sex or not I'd say most people in a relationship, even a non committed one, wouldn't be happy with the person having other sexual partners.

[Peaspeculiars]

Antonia, When you have FWB's it will be just that. Friends that have sex. No real feelings, and no commitment. When one side of the party want more, then it's time to move on as you're not sticking to the deal.
As previously mentioned, the story from the ex-girlfriends sides is likely to be more than he is telling you - If you were a man and wanted to get someone into bed would you say 'I really messed up in my last relationship, I kept sleeping around' or 'I'm so hurt, we tried so hard, I'm a sensitive soul, come here and feel sorry for me' ?
Apologies, harsh - but don't get your heart broken by someone who doesn't want to be in a monogamous relationship with you.
Plus, the fact that he can sleep around, but you can't makes me nervous - don't let anyone control you like that, it doesn't make sense.

[Cloverjo]

Sorry to be harsh, but I'm in agreement with people here. He's using you. It's tough, but that's how it looks to us. Find another FWB if that's what you'd like, but it sounds like you're falling for this guy, and nothing good will come out of it for you.

[ummmm]

FWBs use each other. That's what the relationship is based on. As long as people are honest with each other.

[B00]

Think you're looking for feelings from this guy which just aren't there.

Not sure what the relevance of using condoms is? to me that just says he's being sensible.

As for calling you and the touchy feely stuff he does- of course he does and is, he needs to keep you sweet if he's to continue having sex with you!