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Loosehead | 13:26 Thu 06th Oct 2005 | Body & Soul
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Why does entering a supermarket remove 90% or the inteligence and 90% of the motor functions from the average customer? I mean people just dawdle about like extras from Dawn of the dead! It's as if ASDA has pumped some sort of gas into the atmosphere!
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Was walking behind some bottom feeders in Tesco recently we were all half way down the pet aisle.  As they shambled along the woman eventually stopped turned to the man and said, why we darn ere for we aint got no pets?

hmmmmmm.

What about the people who think it's OK to drive the wrong way round the car park? And the ones who park in two bays at the same time? And the ones who abandon used trolleys in parking bays? And the ones who handle fruit without buying it? And the ones who take their children so they can smack them in public? I've given up on the appalling places.

Just a minor rant, I haven't really started yet.

This is one of my biggest pet hates - the dawdling gets right on my tits, so much so it actually starts to make me angry, which I know is daft, but I just can't help it.

Also people who stand for absolutely ages in front of the bit that you want to get to, and just stare at the products, usually with their mouths open and a little bit of spittle at the side of their gobs, without actually putting anything in their baskets. Idiots.

And then you get to the checkouts - hell on earth - I've stood behind people in the past who haven't started to bag up their goods until all the shopping has been scanned - I mean what goes through these buffoons minds.

I am convined that everybody in a supermarket is there specifically just to wind me up.

Am I intolerant? you bet ya.

And now I wait for the self righteous people on this site to helpfully tell me that I don't have to go to a supermarket.

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You are so right everyone so far! What about the people that have to examine every single apple to be sure they've got the best one in the shop! Ding dong, those people that stand for ages in fron of the bit where you want to pick something up, invariably have a trolley at their side so they are blocking 6ft of shelf, aaaaggggghhhh!. What about the morons who think baskets only means basket in a trolley is ok! So they are so lazy they can't even carry a basket. Naffing cheques don't get me started in cheques........rant rant!

You haven't seen anything until you've been to a Walmart Super Store in the US.  Now that's where the real zombies hang out!!

Why do so many of them feel the need to then visit the cafe and have their dinner in the supermarket too?  I want to be in and out as soon as possible not treat it as an evening out!

The answer for these people is simple - MAKE A LIST!

All this behaviour is the result of shopping with only the vaguest idea of what they want, and what they have left at home. When I lived alone, I would do a monthly visit for all the buly essentials - listed to make the process as quick and painless as possible for all concerned, and then shop day to day. I drive past a supermarket on the way home - I work out what to have for tea, walk in, but the ingredients, and avoid 'browsing' completely, pay, and walk out. It's not rocket science.

Sadly, I am in the minority, as all the perfectly justifiable complaints above testifiy. It's just 'the public' - you have to smile, or go crazy.

I used to be a checkout girl, the things i used to see!   People who hold money in their mouth before they give it too you, half eaten choc bars coming through ( i just couldnt wait!), used to work at the bakery too and the amount of people who would pick a piece of the tester food up, see it was something they didnt like and put it back yuk!

I know you were joking about Asda pumping some sort of gas into the atmosphere, but I think there is something about supermarkets that saps the brainpower.

I have found that being in a supermarket affects me quite significantly. I've quite often found that I come out with a headache and feel my mental faculties are 'dulled'. The only thing that I can think of is that it may be something to do with sound. My hearing isn't great anyway, but I find the level of background hum in supermarkets is very high and I seem to loose a lot of frequency range and this seems to be associated with my feelings of disorientation. I know that there's a correllation between supermarkets with higher levels of background noise and greater chance of disorientation and headache.

I suppose it could be flourescent light too, but suspect this is a lesser effect - I work under 'em every day with no great ill effects.

What about people that just stand there wanting to get by you but don't actually say "excuse me". Why can't people say it??

Have you noticed that whenever you go in there are no queues, then when you've shot round in 2 minutes flat there are queues stretching right down the aisles ? I believe people wait specifically for me to come in then they run and form queues. Then they all pay by plastic or CHEQUE (Loosehead). Once the guy in front of me paid by cash, then I did, so I said to the asst, "That's 2 in a row paying by cash, probably a world record"

to be honest it serves you right for going in to adsa -- you get a better class of zombie in sainsbury
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I've heard that the truly upper class zombies go to the M&S food hall.
I always come back from the supermarket feeling as if I have been put through the mangle. I hate loathe and detest it but it has to be done.I make a list ,stick to it and try to get in round and out in the shortest possible time. Cheque payers annoy me no end and Mums who think an outing to Asda is an excuse to scream and yell at their children. People who pick over the fruit and veg annoy me and people who barge in front at the deli counter while we all stand there patiently waiting with our tickets.Then there is the gang of people who haven't seen one another for ages and have a prolonged conversation in the middle or at the end of the aisle and nobody can get past them and if you do say "excuse me " subject to you a filthy look. Grrr! I could go on and on and on .................!!!!! Plus the people who stand reading all the magazines with no intention of buying them !!

Yep, you're all absolutely right! BUT, in my own defence I have to say... having been feeding the family for twenty mumble mumble years sometimes I just have no idea what to do for dinner that's different. So that's me standing looking gormlesly at the shelves for ages 'cos I'm looking for INSPIRATION!

Personally I hate the person who is buying all the same stuff as you and not moving fast enough, but not moving slow enough so you can overtake either.

Asda really is the worst for zombies.  Whenever I'm feeling fat and depressed I go shopping in Asda and I come out feeling like a supermodel!

Especially annoying are the people who stand glassy-eyed and slack-jawed at the checkout while the cashier rings their stuff up and then seem surprised that they are required to pay for the stuff, and take ten minutes looking for their purse.

i get trolley rage!!!!! i now order all the heavy things on line..and go early in the morning before the dross get up and whizz round and get the fresh stuff..as i hate food shopping..their are two women that go round our sainsburys on a thursday morning at 08.00 on those mobility scooters..they wont let you pass and they talk really loud about everything they pick up off the shelf..irritating or what!!!!!!! then their are two people that look like tramps the shop staff call them posh and becks!!!  so i make sure i pick everything from underneath or the back of the shelf as they dont look clean..people are very irritating in supermarkets..so i go as early as possible..i allways think they are rude also as i spend about �250 and the trolley will be over loaded and i get comments like "are you having a party" or "you must have a big family" so i normally say yes 10 kids to feed and we live on benefits!!!!!!!!!!that gives them something to think about..and if i am in a grotty mood i tell them to mind their own business!!!!!!...by the way my trolley will be full as i only go every 4 weeks..as i cant face supermarkets weekly..
I shop at tescos....online...(:)Plus you get �10...�15...codes on the net...so you never pay for delivery..plus you get a tenner of your grocerys...which normally means I get my booze free...(:)yab..adaba...do:::::::::::::::::!
whats all this vinny?  I shop online at Tesco sometimes I dont get any money off?? What am I missing?

�5 off your groceries on a �50 spend: 2J92QJCDRXGK 31/07/2006
1,000 extra Clubcard points 37DXRQNPBG8L 16/10/2005
500 extra Clubcard points on a �50 spend: 3HHRPNK8386K 16/10/2005
�15 off your groceries on a �100 spend: 73MN2M36ZPMN 25/09/2005
1,500 extra Clubcard points on a �100 spend: FPCRTPJ8FKNH 16/10/2005
�5 off your groceries on a �50 spend: FWPQL4N77H73 30/10/2005
�10 off your groceries on a �75 spend: PZPK3VRJZRHZ 25/09/2005
�5 off your groceries on a �50 spend: QYC2L4HCFF9X 30/10/2005
�5 off your groceries on a �50 spend: VFDW9T7KG82F 04/12/2005
�5 off your groceries on a �50 spend: XWG7D46WLJBG 01/01/2006
1,500 extra Clubcard points on a �100 spend: ZWY9F3MDFF6Y 16/10/2005

just copy and paste !enjoy.

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