Another Bit Of Fun.

[Patsy33]

Things you would never hear a Vicar say...

[mikey4444]

Apologies for this in advance !

"I chased after one of the Choir boys and eventually caught him by the Organ"

[ducksie]

Miley that's a lame apoogy, that's like someone saying 'I don't mean to offend' before they do intentionally offend

[ducksie]

that was an apology - all round - sorry

[DTCwordfan]

"Christ, what the hell is going on here....."

"I'm afraid that we are out of communion wine this Sunday, as my wife drank it, playing poker with her friends."

[-SharonA-]

For Christ's sake!

[Barsel]

Does my bum look big in this cassock?

[Arksided]

'Anyone seen my trident ?'

[cupid04]

And our final hymn will be 'bat out of hell!'

[clyde59]

More tea vicar

[Buenchico]

"This week's communion wine is a rather cheeky little Sauvignon Blanc"

[Buenchico]

"Oi, Bishop! Are you wearing that silly hat for a bet?"

[Buenchico]

"Whoever's holding the plate when the organ stops gets to keep the collection"

[Buenchico]

"This week the numbers displayed on the board aren't those of the hymns we'll be singing. They're my regular lottery numbers, which have just won me fifty million quid. So, now that I don't have spout all the usual rubbish in order to get paid, I can tell you what i really think about religion"

[Buenchico]

"This morning's sermon comes to you courtesy of our sponsor, the Paedophile Information Exchange"

[Buenchico]

"Lets all see who can make up the longest and most outrageous confessions to the Catholic priest up the road before he realises he's been duped"

[Buenchico]

"Yes, of course I can marry you and your partner on the 25th of December. I don't think I've got anything else to do on that day"

[Buenchico]

"Do you sell those little cross things that I've seen people wearing around their necks? Have you got one with the little man on it?"

[Buenchico]

"For Lent this year, I'm giving up religion"

[Buenchico]

"I've just read about some stupid billionaire who gave his newborn son some really stupid gifts. OK, gold I can understand but scent and embalming oil? Who the hell would do that?"

[Peter Pedant]

Oh go to hell !

something I DID hear a minister say was
" I am a protestant vicar - not a Roman Catholic saint !"
( about he had taken in his wayward daughter when no one else would and then found out why)