When Harry met Sally?!

[Scarlett]

Is there any truth in the saying that men cannot have platonic friendships with women without secretly fancying them?

[arty7774]

I have lots of female friends I don't fancy.

I also have some that I do though.

Sorry Scarlet if this don't help you.

[littlemissx]

yes i have loads of male friends i dont fancy

[TopCat1]

I'm a female and I have 3 bestfriends who are male and I'm pretty sure none of them fancy me, and I don't fancy any of them. We have been friends for 10years now and I shared a house with 2 of them years ago. We have all since married and I am now best friends with their wives and they are mates with my hubby.

[Dakota2]

I would have said there was no truth in it, but recently it has come to light that my best mate (who is male) has been in love with me for a long time. I'm not sure what to do with this information (I absolutely 100% do not feel the same), so I'm mulling over it for now.

Having said that, I have lots of male friends who are not as close to me as the one mentioned who don't want anything more than friendship :)

[andy hughes]

There is no strict rule on this - it depends on the individuals. My closest friend in the world is a woman - 34 years and counting - but we were each other's first girl and boyfriend so we got 'all that' out of the way early on!

The rule is, if you fancy a good friend, hide it! It's breaking a vase - a step forward you can't step back from - you say you'll still be friends, you glue the vase, but it is never ever the same again.

Of course, relationships can do do grow from platonic friendships, but unless you are 110% sure your friend feels the same, leave it alone. The main bigbear is, men (who do this far more than women!) want their feelings to be reciprocated, so they behave as if they are. No signs are given by the lady, so the man will put them there in his mind, and act as if the indications were hers.

Cue shock horror from her - hurt surprise from him.

You have to be honest - if she wants you, she'll let you know, and if she's seeing someone else, she's not 'just playing hard to get ...' she's not interested!

Learn the lesson boys - or move away from your friend - save some heartache all round.

[metagirl]

all my male friends started out as friends, then became physical, now we're friends. as andy hughes says it all depends on the individual, but if a girl is even vaguely attractive more than likely the guy will fancy her. otherwise, as my wise male friend back in high school said, "what's the point?"

girls may be more likely to have a platonic friendship with a male and keep it that way, but if the guy is attractive there HAS to be some flirting occurring.

[Chessman]

I think, thats it an almost impossible mission, but if your in a happy relationship, you don't, and you don't let on that you do, it in the genes. simple as that

[Gef]

No - and I have read the question very carefully.

[bracknell]

my best friend is male and no there is nothing between us. He has a girlfriend, but somehow she is jealous of the friendship we have. If he has a problem, he always rings me or pops round and the same for me. Sometimes I feel as if he is the younger brother I never had.

[Scarlett]

Bracknell,

Are you SURE he doesn;t fancy you??!