What's The Weirdest Job You've Ever Done?

[kvalidir]

This afternoon I have a really weird job to do. I have to, amongst other things, have Botox in my forehead despite not having any real wrinkles for a corporate shoot for a Beauty Salon. They want someone with no wrinkles so they can show how well it works?!? I must admit I'm not keen on the idea, but it's paying very well and I'm reassured it's perfectly safe. What is the weirdest thing you've ever done as a job?

[ferlew]

When I was 15, I poked the holes in the pork pies on a conveyor belt, prior to them going in the oven.
Then I got promoted to putting the jam into jammy donuts.

[kvalidir]

Ho do you put Jam in Doughnuts Ferlew... never thought about it really.

[scooping]

As a kid spent a while as a whelk wormer. It involved sawing into the 'back' of a whelk and pulling out the intestinal sack, thereby making it less chewy. Graduated to dressing crabs and getting the white meat from crabs' legs.

[kvalidir]

Wow all these awesome jobs I never have thought about, I like Whelks as well :)

[Zacs-Master]

I once made a 56 inch gasket for an industrial boiler. Not exactly ‘wierd’ but somethin I never thought I’d do.

[sunny-dave]

I had a summer job at a sewage treatment plant - my Monday morning job was using a pointy stick to remove the condoms from the holes in the rotating sprinklers. Hundreds of the dratted things - Aylesbury must have been on a permanent shagathon that summer.

[Zacs-Master]

Ahhhh, fond memories of my summer in Aylesbury. The money that chemist took from me. Sheesh!

[kvalidir]

That's amazing, keep em coming:) I've got to go and do this now, but I'm back later with a rigid face probably lol :)

[tiggerblue10]

In my mid-twenties I did a couple of extra jobs, one involving night work cleaning electrical pipes in Canary Wharf and one as a steward at Wembley Stadium.

[woofgang]

I made a splint and devised exercises to enable an armed plain clothes policeman to keep his job. It was while I was on student Occupational Therapist placement at the London Hospital.
He was a rugby player and had dislocated a finger playing rugby for the Scotland Yard team. Part of his job was to carry and fire a handgun for which he needed full strength and mobility in all the fingers of his right hand. The joint had been put back but he had both residual stiffness and muscle weakness so two of us students were given the task of rehabilitation. We saw him twice a week for four weeks and also he had a custom splint which we made to isolate the joint that needed exercise. The treatment was a complete success and at the end of the four weeks he passed his firearms assessment. We were never told (and couldn't ask of course) what his actual job was.

[gness]

Hi, Kval.....I started as a children's entertainer's assistant on a Saturday morning......resigned on Saturday evening....

As I drove the "entertainer" to the village hall in my van we had a mishap.....ending with him being pinned by a see-saw to the passenger seat with his head between his knees...and a lit cig in his mouth.....until it fell into his carpet slipper.....tartan....
There was another mishap when he was in his Punch and Judy tent swearing at the kids.....and he swallowed his swazzle.....
That was partly my fault but I was on the verge of a breakdown by then...you know when you're crying and laughing hysterically at the same time.....and I just didn't care if he survived or not.... x

[Ken4155]

The army were very good at 'weird'. I've already told the story of being made to water the plants outside the Officer's Mess in the pouring rain. I've also had to paint dead grass green for a visit to the garrison by Princess Anne and i also remember being put on cookhouse fatigues where my job was to butter hundreds of slices of bread for our day out on the rifle range. This was done by dipping a scrubbing brush in melted butter and swiping it across each slice! From then on in, i always went hungry on days out at the rifle range:-/

[ChillDoubt]

Princess Anne was visiting the camp next to ours whilst stationed in W. Germany. She wasn’t even scheduled to attend our barracks but the Sgt Major decreed that there was not enough grass on the bank near our Duty Room, so we had to paint the bare ground a lovely emerald hue!

[Zacs-Master]

[ChillDoubt]

Ken,
Only just seen your post!
We’re you in Germany 88-90?
Or are we in a long list of soldiers who had to perform the same/similar tasks for visiting royalty that has no doubt befallen us and our comrades throughout history? LOL

[whistonian]

During my square bashing days having to cut the grass around the billets with a pair of scissors.

[beso]

ferlew //When I was 15, I poked the holes in the pork pies on a conveyor belt, prior to them going in the oven. //

Me too! But not just pork pies.

I got promoted to the job of spraying the pies with water to stop them burning on top. I was considered an expert at this task so they kept me on it.

The spray head had long ago lost its lever and operators had to press directly on the valve. I developed a hard patch on my hand there and I do believe I can still feel a remnant more than forty years later.

[Ken4155]

ChillDoubt; Bit too late for me; i was stationed in Hohne, W Germany between '73 and '78. The Princess Anne incident came prior to that when i was at Bramcote, Nuneaton, as a 'boy' soldier (16 to 18 year old)in the Junior Leaders Regiment Royal Artillery. During that time, we were also made to sweep fallen leaves on the windiest of days. There was/is no limit to the army's stupidity :-/

[Ken4155]

And Zac's 'Derek and Clive' clip took me right back to Hohne. Remember when that first LP first came out - we laughed so much, we were almost unfit for duty.

[Eleena]

They want someone with no wrinkles show how well it works kval?
No one could pay me to inject something in to my skin if it wasn't needed.