Its A Joke. Dont Dare Be Ill!

[nailit]

My 85 yr old mum was admitted last Saturday to A&E. She had a really painful arm, (thought that she had broke it) an arm that was fitted with a metal plate 2 yrs ago after a fracture. After 13 hrs in A&E and numerous tests...scans, bloods and xrays...she was taken onto an oncology ward and was told that she had bone cancer and needs palliative care.
She has been discharged today with a promise to refer her back to the original surgeon who fitted the plate in her arm for further exploration (she has bone missing in her arm apparently)
*The surgeon is on holiday for 3 weeks, so have got to wait for an appointment with him.
*was promised that a care team would come out shortly after her discharge (at 1pm) to discuss further home care. They never showed!
* Her meds were taken of her while in hospital and were replaced with someone elses. My sister has had to go back at 5 oclock tonight to pick up her script.

If my mum didn't have family to take care of her she would have been f *****!
What the hell is up with the NHS that they cant co-ordinate between departments?
This is a very sick old lady?
To top it all they are on about taking her arm off when a surgeon has previously told her that he wouldn't find an anetheatist willing to take such a risk given her previous medical history of heart disease, kidney failure and an undiagnosed liver problem.

We all feel like we have just been left to watch our mum die in pain.

[nailit]

Sqad, you don't do grief, I get that! But please help me out here.

[Mamyalynne]

Your Mum has had a very erratic and disjointed time there, lots of unanswered questions and failures in communication - I don't expect you to see the NHS as anything other than useless at the moment.

In your shoes, I would too.

My Daughter was admitted as an emergency yesterday and has had wonderful treatment.

I hope you get some real help and advice with your Mum's care.

[nailit]

Thank you Mamy,
Just to clarify, my mum has received THE BEST treatment ever while in hospital. Its just the after care that's an issue (or the lack of it)

[Mamyalynne]

I understand, you feel she and you as a family have been abandoned.

Is the diagnosis of bone cancer a definite one?

[-SharonA-]

I'm so sorry to hear this, but am not surprised. Last week my friends mum was taken to hospital with black toes. They sent her home same night with cream for toes. It now turns out she has kidney problems and is back in hospital.

[nailit]

//Is the diagnosis of bone cancer a definite one?//
Again Mamy, that's something else. We were all told that Its a certainty but now told that its more than likely (given the blood test result etc). Looking likely but not necessarily so. WT F?

[Patsy33]

It's very demoralizing for you all. You're right, one department doesn't seem to know what the other is doing. I've witnessed this this sort of thing before. Very worrying. You've got a enough on your plate already. Perhaps the care team went to the wrong house/ patient! Hope things can get sorted soon for you dear Mum.

[Mamyalynne]

You certainly need some answers, not sure what more I can say - so sorry.

[nailit]

Sharon, its a joke. How can they miss major organ failure?

[nailit]

//Perhaps the care team went to the wrong house/ patient! //
They had my sisters phone number as the next of kin Patsy, never rang her...

[237SJ]

Is it bone cancer or breast cancer spread to the bones and has your Mum had a bone scan? I had all of this with my Mum but once they have left hospital, you are pretty much on your own. In our case, the hospice was next to useless as well.

[-SharonA-]

Nailit, don't ask me. The NHS is a mess both in patient care and after care.

[nailit]

237,
she was given the all clear from breast cancer last year (she had it 5 yrs ago). The thinking was that it was a secondry cancer from that.

[237SJ]

Yes nailit. That's what I mean. It is still breast cancer even though it is in the bones.

[237SJ]

I wonder if the fracture was bone spread 2 years ago and nobody picked up on it - amazing if they didn't

[Sqad]

Nailit...I cannot tell hay from a bull's foot here.
The problem/diagnosis is obscure, I could make a guess but that is all it will be, but as long as she has got pain relief, that is the most important factor here.
Unfortunately in Body and Soul, medical terms, expressions, diagnosis are banded about without knowledge of what they are saying or meaning, by people that mean well, but just fail to understand the complete picture.
I don't intend to add to the confusion except to say that nobody is seriously considering taking her arm of and if we are dealing with palliative care with cancer, then I am sure that it will be provided.
As I have said.....if she has pain relief, then that is the main feature of your mother's care for the next few weeks.
Sorry i cannot be of further help, but i do not know the full facts.

[nailit]

Sharon
//The NHS is a mess both in patient care and after care//
Cant complain about the impatient care but where the hell are the nurses who were supposed to come out to her? I stayed with her from 1pm until 5pm and then had to go and leave it to my sisters.
My sister has got her into bed and has had to lock her in her own home as she needs 2 hands to lock her front door and she hasn't got 2 hands.

[nailit]

Sqad, thank you so much for replying except
//I don't intend to add to the confusion except to say that nobody is seriously considering taking her arm of//
Yes they are, seriously!

[nailit]

But they cant take her arm off, she wouldn't survive the anesthetic never mind the shock!

[jennyjoan]

so sorry to hear about your mum - as Sqad says you want her to be pain free.