Oh my god, he's made me so nervous

[pinkiefriend]

Well it's like this. Over three weeks ago I split with my boyfriend of three 1/2 years. Well he split with me! Anyway, it was hard trying to get over him but I feel like I have done well. We haven't had much contact but today, I receive a text from him saying that he will call me later... It's put me all wrong! My stomach feels like it's churning about, and my concentration has gone. I want to know how to handle the situation later when he does call, any ideas. I don't want back with him back but I want to show how strong a girl I am and how good I am getting on. I also don't want to jump at his requests of coming round to the house to collect the last of his stuff. I want to be a bit of a bitch, but not too much of one! I'm sure you can understand. Any Ideas??

[WaldoMcFroog]

Perhaps mention how much of a weight off your shoulders it's been to split up! Don't go into any detail, and just keep it cryptic.

As for the getting his things, you need to arrange a time that is convenient to you, not him. Tell him he'll have to be quick as you're going out with friends half an hour later. Box all his stuff up for him so it's ready for him to just chuck in a car, close the door firmly when he leaves. Be polite but not talkative. Arrange for a mate to come around as soon as he's left.

[indian]

Great ideas above. When he calls and asks how you are say "yeh...great. Actually I'm going out in a minute so this'll have to be a quick call". This gives him the message that you've got a busy life of your own now and it'l make hime get to the point.

Good luck and let us know how you get on :-)

[funnywebsite]

Like the others said, get his stuff ready by the door. Don't let him in. Just give him the things and say you are off out. My friend had this happen to her, he dumped her, changed his mind a week later, then the week after dumped her again. Don't let this happen to you.

[pinkiefriend]

Well since I typed up this question, I have replied to his text saying, "Probably not good idea calling me tonight, phone me tomorrow." That was all the message said, no nice messages or kisses. Do you think I have done the right thing?

[Cockney_si]

By him calling you could be a few possibilities:

he could say that he's found someone else

he could say he's sorry and he wants you back

he could be bitter and twisted about it all

[Robinia]

You've had some great replies already pinkiefriend so I'll try to keep it short.
I can understand that you'd like to be (a bit) bitchy with him but that will only make him think he's got to you. Polite & firm I think is the way to go, don't be too stoney-faced or too cheerful. If he's calling to arrange a day to collect his things just say 'Would you (not 'could you' or 'will you') come between *o'clock and *o'clock please?' Make it clear that everything will be ready for him. He'll probably be expecting you to be off-hand with him so if you're indifferent it will confuse the hell out of him believe me!
Best of luck! :-)

[mimififi]

definately, I'd be misses great-little-attitude, it will confuse and irritate him. When he comes for his stuff, do just as the other's have said, give a specific time, don't just say you have somewhere to be, arrange an actual somewhere to be. Say things like:"Oh thanks for coming to get it, I was all ready to post it to you, you've saved me the bother now..and If we miss each other, I'll just leave it all on the doorstep, ok!." and "oh, it's so good to feel fresh and new again isn't it. You know, It was a little shock when you said it was over, but, you were so right. Anyway, I have a ?????????to go to now. so, bye then...." and of course, it goes without saying that you look great when he sees you and perhaps be distracted by a text convo at the same time....just for added putting-him-in-his-place measures. You are the new woman that he left you to go looking for, and now, he can't have you...! Great.

Good luck to you. It's great to see that you are upbeat about your new life. You are gonna have such a jolly fab time. Snaps for Pinkiefriend!

[gucciman]

it all depends if you want to have him back or not? if you don't then the best way to get over someone is to completely block them out of your life for good. break all contact with them, change your numbers if you have to, dump all his old photographs and letters etc. move on and find someone else when your ready.

if you do want him back then make sure he didn't dump you because he had someone else and now hes come running back cos hes been dumped too.