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Better Way To Acknowledge The Birthdays Of Dead People...?

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joko | 01:01 Sat 19th Oct 2019 | Society & Culture
9 Answers
When someone has died, people still always write or say 'happy birthday' on social media etc

i always think that sometimes it seems a little bit odd, to say you wish for them to have a 'happy' birthday ... because clearly it isnt a happy day, for them or anyone else.

now, i know its just a really common phrase and its just what people say on birthdays, which is fine, not judging anyone for it.
i know there is nothing actually 'wrong' with it exactly - its not like its an offensive thing to say, but i wondered what else could be more 'appropriate' comments to write?

something that acknowledges that today is their birthday, but has 'meaning' about the fact theyre dead - not just best wishes or all the best or something

Any ideas?
thanks :)
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I don't use Facebook, Twitter or WhatsApp, but I have seen this on the Facebook page of a friend of mine whose husband died some years ago. People like you say, wishing the dead person a Happy Birthday, we love you, etc. It actually upsets my friend when she sees it, it's not something she wishes people to do. However, you asked what could be said instead and I think perhaps something like 'Remembering you on your birthday' would be more suitable.
strikes a chord with me, today is what would have been my mum's 98th birthday is she'd been alive.
As she's not, seems a bit pointless to wish her a happy birthday.
Seeing posts/comments like Happy Birthday is heaven just annoy me for some strange, inexplicable reason.
I have no idea what an appropriate thing to say would be, it would have to be very personal from the sender to the intended recipient as no doubt someone would find fault.
When it would've being the birthday of the late great Freddie Mercury (See link), I was actually mindful of not posting Happy Birthday as it seemed wrong to me, having read on facebook, posts wishing him a happy birthday.

Thinking of you on your birthday... or remembering you on your Birthday.

https://www.theanswerbank.co.uk/ChatterBank/Question1673842.html
This is about the feelings of the living not the dead isn't it. If one believes in an afterlife, one can't know if they're happy or sad where they now find themselves. Sometimes it's best to just shrug and not get upset at the good wishes of others.
I actually wouldn't say anything unless a close family member raises the subject and then I would take my cue from them.
I like to say ‘thinking of you on his/her birthday’
Aye. Happy birthday does fine, myself and some friends toasted happy birthday to the late stegess yesterday as it was her birthday, where ever she is now I still hope she’s happy.
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not remotely upset OG, just wondered about a more appropriate phrase ... as i said
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