Modern Masculinity

[Khandro]

Men have lower life expectancy than women, and significantly higher suicide rates. They are more likely to be the victims of violence and are falling behind educationally.

Certain "male" behaviours that used to be acceptable no longer are, and many within the younger generation feel lost & even demonized in what they see as an increasingly "feminised" culture.

What's going on?

[pixie374]

It's not "my" definition, khandro- it's the actual one.

[naomi24]

But that doesn't define 'modern masculinity' pixie - just 'masculinity' which has existed across the ages.

[Khandro]

what archibaldy 23:25 Thu. is describing is 'macho man' nothing to do with it & what you pixie is describing is simply biological man, also null & void.

Describing a real man is like describing a spiral staircase; you know what it is when you see it but it isn't easy to define.

First example that springs to mind might be say, Jordan Peterson.

[bednobs]

then you question becomes impossible to debate or answer "But where are the REAL men? (& for that matter, where are the real women?)"
if the definition is personal to you, no one can debbate with you over it

[pixie374]

I know, naomi- that question was about defining "real men'. The rest is just opinion about personal preferences, nothing to do with masculinity.

[Khandro]

^^ sounds a bit like you two haven't been fortunate enough to meet one, (yet?)

[Atheist]

Khandro; "sounds a bit like you two haven't been fortunate enough to meet one, (yet?)"
A tad patronising?

[Redhelen72]

My husband is masculine, handsome (in my opinion) very intelligent, caring and many would consider 'woke'.
But I would not change him for anything!

[naomi24]

Your idea of a 'man' doesn't necessarily agree with mine, pixie, but I think Khandro is talking about the change in attitudes. For example, if a man tells me he's in touch with his 'feminine' side, I'm not impressed. I don't want a man who has a 'feminine' side at all. Additionally, I think because of the attitudes of some women, men are 'lost' - and as Khandro says, even demonised. I cite the case of a man who invited a work colleague out to dinner - and she regarded that simple invitation as sexual harassment. Similarly, a man touches a woman's arm and she screams sexual assault, or simply opens the door for her and she says he's sexist. I would hate to be a man in this day and age. I honestly feel quite sorry for them.

[bednobs]

also, my husband has never felt the need to shame my looks or call me "not beautiful" in front of the world in print a la jordan peterson. if someone insulting women because of their looks is an xample of a real man, perhaps i havent met one

[naomi24]

// if someone insulting women because of their looks is an xample of a real man//

Who said it is, bednobs?

[Redhelen72]

I find it a shame that some women long for the days of 'real men' a time where men were allowed to legally rape their wives and to hit them to keep them in line!
No thank you I prefer a man who respects me!

[bednobs]

ps it's absolutely fine for men to find individual women unattractive, just boorish to call them out as not beautiful in the public domain. I dont think that's woke to say

[bednobs]

that person who khandro held up as an example of a "real man" naoimi

[naomi24]

RH, //I find it a shame that some women long for the days of 'real men' a time where men were allowed to legally rape their wives and to hit them to keep them in line! //

Who does that?

[naomi24]

Thanks bednobs. Checking back through the thread.

[bednobs]

i'd never heard of him N, so i put his name in a search engine

[naomi24]

I know who he is, bednobs, and now I see where Khandro's question is coming from. He reads and admires some strange people..

[youngmafbog]

//I find it a shame that some women long for the days of 'real men' a time where men were allowed to legally rape their wives and to hit them to keep them in line!//

Good God, what a load of rubbish.

[Khandro]

The thread has got a bit off line; my original point was that young men don't seem have the role models in the shape of 'real men' as they (we) had in the past, and many of them are being brought up by single mothers. I was lucky enough to have some good, strict but fair, school teachers, & my dad, was definitely a 'real man': served in the RAF throughout the Africa Campaign WWII, was a prize-winning (along with mum) ballroom dancer, supervised the electrification of the Manchester - London railway line, & yet would spend much time putting in electric wall-sockets & doing jobs for elderly lady neighbours, for which he would accept nothing for payment beyond a packet of cigarettes.

I mentioned JP because he's not intimidated by bossy woke women & he actually wrote a book aimed at young men called '12 Rules for Life'.
As I remember, the first rule was, 'Stand up straight', - pretty good!

He's easily viewable having many youtubes on the internet on many topics, & it seems typical that bednobs, not knowing of him, goes searching, & out of all that material can only come up with that one phrase I've never heard of, & which is completely out of context to boot.