Loneliness

[Karmlady]

Been struggling with loneliness since broke up with bf couple of years ago and also especially over this Christmas period with 4 days off work but being ill so not seeing my mum on xmas day as planned. Be glad to go back to work tomorrow.
I need to find a way to make some friends but it's so hard. I'm 35, no children so can't meet people that way and hate all this communication via Internet. I yearn for real connections and real company, perhaps walk or drink in the pub.

[Canary42]

The trouble with this site karmlady is that until you get to "know" people, it can sometimes be off-putting. There are one or two responses here which would (IMHO) horrify newbies, but they're harmless really,

Anyway, no tips from me (80, single) I'm afraid, just Good Luck

[Sqad]

///Why do you think Karma would appear to be gagging for it, Sqad?///

It,s women isn't it,sex on a plate at request which suddenly disappears.

[gness]

Don't be afraid, Canary...there's time yet. :-)

[Canary42]

"I'm afraid" referred to there being no tips, not to my single status which suits me fine :-D

[MissTerious2]

Personally I would prefer a new dog to a new man! They're less trouble!l

[Karmlady]

Lottie and lofty sound familiar. Probs seen you on here all those years ago :-). I was Karmgirl. So funny looking back at old posts and how immature I sounded when I was 20 lol.

Thanks Barry. Useful to know about the tab for groups. I will have a look.

Loads of good advice and support! Thank you all so much! X

[Sqad]

/////Personally I would prefer a new dog to a new man! They're less trouble!l/////

LOL...lol ..at the age of 35years ?

[gness]

Not for me, MissT! Dogs can't cook.

[Karmlady]

Alright sqad. Wouldnt hurt to perhaps tone it down a bit! Good job I got some of the others looking out for me on here and I know better than to take too much notice. Lol is one of those annoying habits u pick up isn't it. I find it annoying myself to be honest.

[MissTerious2]

On second thoughts then Gness mine cooks and cleans ,shops, launders and chauffeurs as well as puts up with me. And he's our electrician, plumber, builder, etc etc. So I'll keep him.

[gness]

Wise woman, MissT. I mean...who else would put up with you?.. ;-)

[MissTerious2]

Agreed!

[Xeronema]

Welcome back to AB Karmlady, I took some time away myself. I don't think there's much I can add that hasn't already been said. I guess the only thing I can offer is that I'm the same age as you and I got the loneliness down really well too, lol.

Be really careful if you're going to use the Nextdoor app, especially if you put your real name and location (it's a bit like Quora when it comes down to using real names, the users can get funny if you use a nickname). My suggestion, if you're going to use the app, is to use a fake name, one that sounds believable. Be careful if you post any pictures too - make sure that you don't use GPS tagging on your photos (or if you do, make sure to remove the GPS data before uploading).

[Xeronema]

Wise woman.

Two things, my Lord, must ye know of the Wise Woman. First… she is a woman! And second… she is…

[rowanwitch]

The world seems scary because there are more people telling you the bad stuff. ( And reports are often exaggerated) And the fast majority of people are still decent and honest. 35 is still young, I didn't meet Dave until I was in my 50s.... I agree with the idea of not looking for a new partner look to be a friend, build your circle, friends have friends, you don't know what is around the corner. If you have a good bunch of people around you it will make the journey easier. I am not by any means attractive but the right person won't give a monkeys.... Widen your horizons and open your mind to new experiences be prepared to say ok, why not.... rather than what if...

[MissTerious2]

Next door keep asking me to add new neighbours into the app. I haven't got the app. I keep trying to tell them that although we live in one of the largest parishes area wise, there are only 50 dwellings in three hamlets and with less than 100 names on the parish electoral register. They keep ignoring me. Nothing happens in our parish! We only have two neighbouring dwellings.

[Sqad]

Sorry, my opinion is not what you wanted to hear, but it is my honest assessment.
There are plenty on AB that will tell you what you want to hear.

[Karmlady]

You have great advice again Rowan.

Xero - good to know I'm not alone in feeling lonely at 35.

[Xeronema]

MissT, a couple of possibilities there, which could be the cause of Nextdoor emailing you regarding invitations.

1. Someone has used your email address to sign you up to Nextdoor (this is unlikely as you'd have received an email when they did this).
2. Someone tried to invite you via the app and now you've been put on a mailing list.
3. It's just an attempt, by Nextdoor, to get as many people signed up as possible.

If the invitation was via the post, then it will have come from neighbours or by Nextdoor themselves. I received my invitation from a neighbour which was generated by the Nextdoor app (it was on official looking paper with the Nextdoor logo and everything - the only reason I knew it was from a neighbour was because someone gave it to the postman to post (it had a stamp but didn't go through the post office).

[Karmlady]

It's good to hear all views sqad. I too appreciate realism