lonely

[jamila]

my husband used to be quite effectionate but 4 yrs dwn tha trak and 2 kids later he doesnt hold my hand kiss me gdbye the only time we kiss is wen he wants to get busy (u knw wat i mean) dnt get me wrong his a hard workin man and a great father ust dont know how to get him interested again.

please help how do u tell a man that u still need effection by not being too clingy and pushy

[stanleyman]

You have to just remind him how he was and you can always instigate things yourself, not difficult.

[sammd]

My boyfriend is the same. I agree with stanleyman, the best way is to instigate it yourself - kiss him goodbye, reach for his hand first, cuddle up to him on the sofa...hope it works!

[Dollie]

You try setting the scene - get the kids minded, you know - candlelit meal and a nice bath etc etc. Tell him how you feel - if you can talk about it you can mend it. If he's unresponsive after you've tried - deliver an ultimatum - tell him you want him to come with you to a couples counsellor to have some mediation. It works for loads of couples and helps them to turn a corner in their relationship

[dancealot13]

This is a difficult sittuation to be in, and yet so common. Dollie gave you great advice. Be honest with him though. Tell him you want to start spending time with him, and that effection is important to you.

Ive been with my boyfriend for 5 years, and we recently went through a dry-spell, we even talked about breaking up, but we fought through it, and have recently recindled that spark. And you can do the same, but he has to know about this so he can participate to his fullest.

One peice of advice. Remember its not your looks or so much you clothing that you need to change. Its a matter of sitting down playing games together, going on hikes, going out to dinner, things that spark conversations..things that bring out those two beautiful personalitys you both fell in love with.

People are so quick to get makeovers and lose weight, but remember when he was your boyfriend and thought you looked so sexy in a t-shirt and swetpants? Thats because he loved you for all of you, not just your looks.

hope that helped a tad. Best of luck friend.