should i step back?

[kafers]

i like this dude and we get on so well, today i found out that an aqquaitance of mine also likes him and she told me to back off? should i persue the guy or give him space?

[China Doll]

Nope, you go for it Kafers! No one has the right to warn someone 'off' (unless they're married!) as it's the blokes choice who he does or does not date. If you back off and he likes you but then thinks you don't like him how would you feel then?! You go for it, good luck.

[scruffscat]

i agree you go for it ,who does this woman thinks she is telling you to back off? hope it was in jest.

[kafers]

oh they used to date, but that was a couple years back, n lasted under a month

[China Doll]

Well then she really doesn't have a leg to stand on. You go for it, you'll regret it if you don't.

[kafers]

ok well theres a party to nite, any ideas what i should say?me n the guy are sharing a taxi home, it may be awkward

[China Doll]

Well what do you talk about normally when you're getting on well? Just do that but more so... and perhaps some subtle arm patting and leaning in forwards, that kind of thing. And if you have a hobby or something you both like in common talk about that more. Take your cue off him.

[kafers]

eek im nervous, im 17 tho, would arm patting seem a little strange?

[China Doll]

Not really sweetie, you most likely do it with your friends naturally and stuff when you're emphasising a point or are excited about something. It's just putting a little physical contact in to the relationship where none might have been before but it's not sitting on their lap or anything like that. Lots of eye contact. Wear something that looks nice but that you're comfortable in. Don't get completely blotto, you want to be able to remember what you're doing and be in control as well.

There's also something called mirroring, do you know how to do that?

[kafers]

um isnt that like doing similiar actions to him?

i was thinkin jeans and a low cut top, its an outdoor party?
when you say blotto do you mean gettin drunk?lol

[4getmenot]

She USED to go out with him. I'm sure he doesnt have a label on him saying 'Property of...' Go for it. if she has a go then she isnt a good mate.

[China Doll]

Lol, yeah, getting drunk.

It's something that couples and friends do naturally quite a lot and it happens naturally most of the time but no reason why you can't give it a helping hand... basically I'd stick to if he takes a sip of his drink then take a sip of yours about fifty seconds later.

Look for little clues like face stroking or hair preening (men don't do this too often) as they can be clues that he's trying to get your attention. Watch their body language. That kind of thing. And do take your cue from him, no point going in for a hug if he's sitting there with his arms crossed and a face on him. and try and enjoy it too! Don't spend the whole night obsessnig about whether you did the right thing or said the right thing. And laugh loads.

Your outfit sounds just fine to me.

[kafers]

and if i manage to get any where with him ho do you reckon i should tell the girl?

[China Doll]

You don't, it's none of her business. You said she's an aquaitance so she's not even a friend.

[kafers]

allrighty then. thanks alot ill update 2moro sayn how it went. wish me luck!

[China Doll]

Good luck sweetie, take care.

[xmrs_harmanx]

u do tht girl and y not try a mini skirt?cos if the girl is ther thn u wud wnt to beat her !!

[kafers]

lol i would 'cept i have a tad of thunder thighs!

[missjef]

you should go for it, i reckon it'd be different if she was a best friend or maybe a friend but you said she's just an acquiantance (no idea on spelling!). good luck!!

[xmrs_harmanx]

lmao well go for the tender moments where you catch his eye and he catches yours and you smile and slightly grin (bit sexily) and there is no speech always works ;)

[joko]

love isn't about who gets there first.

she has already been rejected by him once ( i mean that for whatever reason they split because neither are the right for the other)

if she was your best friend then things would be a bit different, but as an aquaintance she has no "jurisdiction" over you.

go for it.