un-ask somebody ??

[JOEYGREEN]

Do you think if you have asked somebody over a year ago to be your matron of honour, you could un-ask them if you don't really see each other any more??

[caz21]

Why dont you see her anymore? if there has been a fall out then she probably wont be expecting to be MoH anyway! however if it because one of you has moved away or something similar then she may very well be deeply offended!

Think it depends highly on the situation!

[violetblue]

I suppose it depends whether you're going to invite the person to your wedding.

[JOEYGREEN]

Well, we used to be really close, I've known her for 19 years but lately we just don't make the time for each other. I have much closer friends who I should've really asked. I asked her when we first booked the wedding and when we were doing the same p/t course together last year. But since we finished the course we haven't really seen each other and to be honest it seems as though I'm making all the effort with calls etc and she just can't be bothered. We both still care about each other and I know we've just gone our different ways but what's a phone call? She's let me down again today and I just think about my other friends and how we all make an effort to see each other as often as possible.

[JOEYGREEN]

Oh, and of course I would still invite her to the wedding.

[China Doll]

Tricky one but ultamately it's your big day and you should have who you want as your maid of honour. I think you might have to bite the bullet and go for it. She may well be offended but as I said, it's your big day. Good luck xx

[JOEYGREEN]

Thanks a lot. I'll probably chicken out though - I wish I had the b@lls to do it. I suppose if things don't improve by Christmas I'll have to un-ask her. You can only try so hard with some people. If they don't wanna know, then don't wanna know.

[caz21]

Well in that case Joey, why should you have someone you dont really want to be MoH i say, if it hasnt been brought up in a long time, say something like, sorry but i've had to ask so and so to be MoH now, as i need to organise and havent seen you in ages, hope you dont mind, i would still like you to come to the wedding though!

[tictactoe]

Hi JOEY,

caz21's last reply is spot on!!


n00dles
xXx

[Pippa68]

I agree ~ caz is definately spot on! if the person you originally asked hasn't been on hand to help with organisation, I doubt whether they are the right person to ask..in fact they may well have already guessed this!

[joko]

could you, would you, still have her as a bridesmaid - just not the main one?