Cutting

[larkin]

Unfortunately, I have developed a propensity to cut my arms.Being referred to community psychiatric team but not sure how long referral will take as GP away this week. My counsellor suggested putting elastic bands around my arm and hurting myself with them if and when the urge to cut arises. Trouble is, when I cut with a blade I don't actually feel anything, so it is not similar
I am not a nut case - just one very troubled person - has anyone out there been through this or know of any really good coping strategies?
I don't want to do it - the sense is just so overpowering sometimes.
Thanks for any information or suggestions. Unfortunately I can't find a self help group in my area.

[Tiny E. A]

You could try squeezing an ice cube in each hand instead.

[gasman]

Hi Larkin, Self harming is more common than people realise, My Friend clenches a few ice cubes in her hands when she gets the urge to harm herself she says it does releive the yearning to cut.

[gasman]

OOps crossed posts there tiny .

[crete]

mornin larkin, there are self help groups in my area and im sure uf you contacted your social work dept they should have a contact number for you,,,,,,, this issue is very often misunderstood.good luck.try typing in self harm on your keypad.

[larkin]

Thank you . I have just filled the ice cube tray up and put it in the freezer. I will try anything to stop this.

Yes, gasman, I now realise that it is more common that I thought - and the reasons could all be on my CV ! It is one thing that has given me the strength to ask. My kids are starting to notice things and I don't want them scarred too.

[PinkFizz]

http://survive.org.uk/selfharm.html


Im sure you have already seen the above link,but if not then it seems very helpful.

Big big hugs to you though.xxxxxxx

[larkin]

Thanks Pink Fizz. Hadn,t seen that one but some similar.

I hate having to ask - just more degradation really. Stable fun loving 42 year old until a few months ago. Hate its affect on my family life.

[PinkFizz]

It takes real guts to ask for help - you should be proud of yourself.xx

[larkin]

Necessity more than wanting to - usually just bury my head .
Thank you. Will rate your answer but not good at accepting praise !
God, I sound a real misery !

[Eve]

HUUUGE HUG to you babe, we can chat later on msn xxx

[mandimoo]

i think that snapping the elastic band is not meant to replace the need to harm by hurting you, instead when you feel the need to harm, snap the band instead. this sends a jolt (albeit mild) as a reminder to not do it. a bit like self hypnosis "whenever i snap this band, it means im thinking of harming, and i mustnt".

[larkin]

mandimoo - pavlov's dogs spring to mind straight away !

Jenna - thanks babe . Will catch you soon. x

[chicklin]

I used to do this when I was 7 years old. At the time I didn't know why I did it, it just used to make me feel better I think. It made the hurt I was feeling less somehow. I know what you mean when you say actually doing it doesn't hurt - it doesn't. I used to use glass that I had broken. It feels really strange to put this in writing because I've never discussed it before. I can really sympathise with you and I think you are so brave to ask for help. Just don't give up asking. I can't imagine what torment you must have in your life to make you feel the need to do this - but I feel for you and really hope it all comes right in the end. Try to stay strong and I'll be thinking of you.x

[larkin]

chicklin. Thank you so much for your answer. I
know that many people do this but answers from souls on here make it seem , oh i don't know, more personal/acceptable/communicable.
It would help if i could actually identify the triggers but i can't .
In the immortal words of Alanis Morisette :
Well life has a funny way of sneaking up on you
When you think everything's okay and everything's going right
And life has a funny way of helping you out when
You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up
In your face .

That's me !!
Going to call Mind this morning to see if there is any help out there .
Thanks again for your openness.
x

[chicklin]

larkin - thanks to you too for finding the courage to speak about this here. I don't think I can offer you much in the way of advice because as I said I did it a long time ago when I was too young to make sense of what I was doing or why I did it. I think as I grew older I gradually stopped doing it, although my life was still far from 'the norm' . Perhaps I just learned other ways to cope? I don't know. Despite this I have turned into a very laid-back kind of person, who worries about very little. And I'm happy with my life now. I really hope you come to the same stage I'm at now. Good Luck and please let us know how you are getting on. X