Ladygarden , when I mentioned that your genetalia was unlikely to have come into contact with the seat , I meant for long enough to catch anything nasty. You did say that you quickly jumped up and I was meaning that you wouldn't have been in contact with the seat long enough - assuming that there was anything there in the first instance which would be an extreme scenario. Seriously though , I would focus more on speaking to your boss about a more thorough cleaning of the toilets if they really are as dirty as you say.
I may be out of line here for saying this and it is with the best intentions that I do say this but by your own admission , you say that you feel that everything is out to get you and I wonder if you have ever spoken to anyone professionally about your fears. I think that if lots of things are causing you fear and alarm then it may benefit you to speak to someone to probe this further and find out why. Good luck anyway x