Fancy my best friends girl...Aaarrrgh!

[TrikkiNikki5]

Hi

My best mates new bird seems amazing and even though I could never admit it to my mate, I really like her.

Its so frustrating as since she came along my mate has dropped me like a hot rock...Do you think maybe I fancy her because I'm missing my mate? Freud would have a field day!!!

I hear all about the small things she does, and her life story thru my mate, and last night when I found out my friend was having doubts, albeit minor ones, I wasnt sure how I felt about it... I shouldn't be happy about it surely?

I'd never do anything to suggest how I feel about this girl, as I'm delighted for my friend who seems really happy for the first time in ages. But she really is lovely.

My brain is going mad with it so just wanted to write it down really....When in doubt do nowt and all that!

Any suggestions on how I can deal with this would be greatly appreciated...

Nik

[efc]

TrikkiNikki - theres isn't anything wrong in fancying your friends girlfriend as long as you don't do anything to interfere with their relationship.
You don't really say how much of your friend you see.
When I go out with the girls we have 'men free' nights - no discussions about partners/bfs etc. Maybe you could suggest something similar without making the reason obvious!
It also sounds like you are hearing a lot about this girl from your friend - don't forget he's the one going out with her so he's bound to be biased! You're only hearing the good things.
Not sure i've been much help!

[starry eyes]

Whatever you do, dont try it on with her!!!!!!!!!! Na, theres nothing wrong in admiring from afar!!!! and you never know, her and your mate may not last, in which case you can then be honest with your mate and see how he feel's about you asking her out! (although in girl world, you never date your ex's mate, i dont know if guys have the same rule,.....do they?!!!) Just give it time, she may even have a single mate that you like even more!.........

[melons]

Oh god im glad im not you. I bet you feel like you are the one going out with her because of you mate waffling on about her all the time.
Its hard when your mate gets a new boyfriend or girlfriend you do everything together for ages and then you seem to get dropped. My advise is dont do anything silly. If she isnt the one for him/her then they will find out themselves, you dont want to be the one that ends it or caused a huge fall out. It might end up with neither of them talking to you and blowing a friendship and a possible FUTURE girlfriend.
Dont do anything huney bun, theres someone out there for all of us. you time will come!!

[TrikkiNikki5]

Ive been thinking about this - I have kinda decided I wrote the question in haste....I dont think I fancy her, just the idea of her, if that makes sense. She's not even my type!!

I'm not looking at her everytime I see her and going 'Cwoar I want a bit of that' but just that she's a fab nice lass and I wouldn't mind a bit like that one day. But not necessarily her.

I wouldnt EVER compromise my friendship with my mate, not embarass the girl by doing anything.

I just feel incredibly left out and since shes come along I only get to see my mate when the girlfriend is busy or doing something else.

Hence I often end up feeling used by my mate. I know its true love for them and stuff but mates are supposed to be there forever aren't they?

[Leight0n]

I've been in a relationship for almost 4 years, my mate was going out with this girl and they split up, me and my girlfriend where there for him when he was single, he was always down at our house for tea and he stayed over a good few times. We totally looked after him.

He later found another girlfriend and what do you know, splat, dropped like a rock. No phone calls not texts, no lads nights out with him or anything. I was really annoyed.

Totally on the spur of things he called me last night and came round for a bit, and what do you know, he's complaining about problems with his missus! Again, as I always am, I was there for him to spill his guts to about his relationship issues, and again I gave him my advice.

Think the moral is that your mates are always there (Just as you are), girlfriend/boyfriends might not always be.